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ripped - 11/04/2009 06:10 - Canada

Today, I saw a dime on the ground. When I bent down to pick it up, my $80 dollar pants ripped. FML

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63 930

human torch - 18/03/2010 15:22 - United States

Today, my physics teacher accidentally lit me on fire. FML

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Please don't do that

anonymous - - Australia

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. He suddenly pulled away, goes, "OMNOMNOMNOM" then continued kissing me. FML

26 367

22 556

Dirty talk

Username - 24/02/2010 15:06

Today, as I was in the middle of giving my boyfriend head, he looked at me and said "Eat that cockmeat sandwich." He seriously thought it was a turn on. FML

28 822

4 784

kingmetal42 - 09/02/2010 19:10 - France

Today, I texted my girlfriend that I'm going to 'lick my professor's ass' instead of 'kick' due to auto-correction on my phone. FML

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27 891