"Your degree will open so many doors" By Lewis - 18/12/2018 00:30 The way I live determined, that was a lie! I agree, your life sucks 223 You deserved it 115 Share Tweet Share
Today, my 9-year-old daughter was acting out and wouldn't do her homework. I told her that if she didn't study, she wouldn't get her acceptance letter from Hogwarts. She looked into my eyes, straight through to my soul and said, "Hogwarts isn't real, retard." FML I agree, your life sucks 39 351 You deserved it 14 547
Today, my pubic hairs were poking into my wang. I went to scratch it. Something bit my hand. FML I agree, your life sucks 22 040 You deserved it 8 378
Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said, "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying, "I'm good" or, "I'm okay", I said, "I'm gay". FML I agree, your life sucks 65 336 You deserved it 25 537
Today, I went ice skating for my friend's birthday. We had to vacate the skating rink so that they could smooth out the rink for the next session. I don't know how to skate and my friends left me. Not only was I the last one out of the rink, but I had to crawl my way out with everyone laughing. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 850 You deserved it 5 978
Today, I’m a middle-school teacher. Handing back graded essays, only to realize halfway through that I’d left my personal notes visible on the projector. One said, “Great kid, but talks like a podcast on 1.5x speed.” The student read it out loud before I could close the tab. FML I agree, your life sucks 82 You deserved it 487
Today, my sister had a C-section to deliver her premature second child. She's also in ICU with a blood oxygen level of 60% because "vaccines are dangerous". We don't know if she will make it out of the hospital or, if she does, how much damage will be caused from the long-term hypoxia. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 360 You deserved it 239