Awkward, Sexting Intimacy Who dis? New phone - FML

Who dis? New phone

Sexting - - United States

Today, my girlfriend's phone was stolen. I have no idea who I've been sexting the entire afternoon. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

vinnnyd 4

Tuesday 21 August 2012 18:56

Hopefully it was a woman.

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 21 August 2012 19:07

His name is Chuck. He thinks ur so hot.

prettylady123 0

Monday 10 September 2012 5:10

Who wants to sext me

jdime209 2

Thursday 11 October 2012 0:07

Text them to meet up somewhere and ask for it back. Lol

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my family are really into rugby so I tried out for a local team. It didn't go well, and afterwards I couldn’t find my dad anywhere. It turns out he was so embarrassed by my sheer incompetence, he got in his car and drove away. I had to walk 9 miles home, which isn’t easy in rugby boots. FML

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Today, I was on an airplane that was experiencing some turbulence. Feeling anxious, I reached over and grabbed my husband's hand for comfort. He then said, "Why are you scared of dying? You're not even pretty." FML

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Today, my mom explained the benefits of douching to me with my boyfriend right there. He began arguing with her about how the vagina is usually self-cleaning. FML

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Today, I was dressing in my apartment when I noticed I left the blinds open. Outside, a maintenance man was mowing the grass within eyeshot. I figured I'd leave the blinds open and give him a little peek of the goods. Later I found a note on my window saying, 'Next time, close the blinds'. FML

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Today, after I'd offered to make suggestions to my partner after she finished writing an essay for her college class, and she'd read my suggestions, we argued about every single point I wrote down. Despite telling her she didn't have to take any suggestions we argued for 2 days about it. The professor had the same notes as mine. FML

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Today, my sister took me out shopping for my birthday and had been drinking a Monster the whole day. Halfway back home, I took a sip of it and she screamed, but it was too late. I had drunk the phlegm that she spat into the can earlier. FML

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