Miscellaneous Weird pick up line, but OK

Weird pick up line, but OK

Anonymous - 03/09/2012 17:16 - United States - Pensacola

Today, I went out clubbing with a few friends. A cute guy pointed at me from the bar and motioned for me to come over. I was excited and did just that. Turns out he just wanted to ask me if I'd thought about seeing a doctor for my jaundice. No, I just overdid my spray tan. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

Misleading

KL. - 05/06/2009 19:46 - Canada

Today, I was at a club with a friend. A cute guy kept smiling and looking over at me. He left his seat and went to the bar and brought back two drinks. He waved me over and then said, "Can you tell your hot friend that I bought her a drink?" FML

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Anonymous - 23/11/2014 01:33 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was at a club and caught a cute guy's eye from across the bar. He smiled at me, got up and came over, then said "Oh shit! You looked way hotter from back there. Damn!" and walked away. FML

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Anonymous - 10/10/2015 04:43 - Canada - Qualicum Beach

Today, desperate to meet a guy, I went clubbing. The only guy to show any interest opened with, "You're hot, for a black chick!" FML

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Anonymous - 24/07/2013 16:05 - Canada - Neustadt

Today, I went to a dance and saw a really cute guy. Glow sticks were everywhere, so trying to be cute, I took a broken one and dripped some of the glowing liquid on my chest. It made him notice me, but only for him to point out that I'd managed to cut myself and was bleeding badly. FML

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Anonymous - 22/10/2014 15:06 - Mexico - Guadalupe

Today, I dressed up in my nicest clothes and spent ages putting makeup on before going to a nightclub, hoping to meet someone nice. The only person who acknowledged me was a guy who yelled, "Hey, wanna fuck?! Not like anyone else would ever touch you, am I right?!" FML

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0ptimu5 - 11/09/2009 04:39 - Australia

Today, I saw a cute girl at a night club. When I approached her and introduced myself, she said "Don't you remember me? We danced here last weekend... but you were smashed that night". I cheekily replied "Oh really? That's hot, what happened next?" She said "You were hitting on me. So, I left." FML

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I Tried - 29/01/2016 22:18 - United States - Burton

Today, I went out clubbing and hit the dance floor, hoping to impress some girls with my moves. All I got was a bunch of weird looks and was told by one girl that I'm the "whitest black guy" she's ever seen. FML

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Anonymous - 29/09/2010 01:47 - United States

Today, I got a spray tan for homecoming. While I was dancing, I got really sweaty and the spray tan rubbed off on the guy's white tux. FML

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Anonymous - 12/08/2019 06:02

Today, I saw a guy at a bar that looked cute. I didn't dare talk to him, though. When I was on my way home, drunkenly singing the entire way, I finally noticed he was walking along behind me. Probably for about 15 minutes. FML

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grenade - 17/07/2011 06:24 - United States

Today, I was at a club with my friends, when a group of guys approached us. It got quiet for a second, and I heard one of them say, "It's okay, I've got the fat one this time," then walk over and start talking to me. FML

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Schizomaniac 24

Tuesday 4 September 2012 2:55

I predict a large number of comments about Snooki. Commence.

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 4 September 2012 2:59

If you used any spray tan at all, you used too much.

DaSandman 9

Tuesday 4 September 2012 13:25

that's what you get for being a douchette

SuzyTurquoiseBlu 25

Tuesday 4 September 2012 15:25

Oh my... how embarrassing. : / At least he was nice enough to worry about your health. Jaundice can be dangerous, especially if your drinking and your liver has trouble processing the toxins from it.

santel_fml 8

Tuesday 4 September 2012 20:04

Loser

tsk14 9

Tuesday 4 September 2012 20:33

Sucks being white lolololo

caitiebug1119 15

Tuesday 4 September 2012 21:36

And you went out like that? It's one thing for your spray tan to turn you orange, but yellow? At least he was concerned for you.

KendraLeigh 2

Tuesday 4 September 2012 22:17

Well that's a lovely shade of snooki you have on today!

fukmefreddy 4

Tuesday 4 September 2012 22:22

I have a much better solution to spray tanning, it's called the sun. It's outside, and it's free, and can usually be found for 12 hours a day... weird right?