Today, I spilled grape juice on my new white shirt. I bleached... - FML

By Anonymous - 24/05/2019 20:07

Today, I spilled grape juice on my new white shirt. I bleached it and scrubbed it until there was nothing left to see. I threw it on, ready to dart out of the door, when my dad walks in after fixing the lawnmower and puts his greasy hand right on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 000

You deserved it 169

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

What are you doing?

By smellsgood - 13/03/2010 19:32 - United States

Today, after finishing the laundry, I took clothes out of the dryer and took a big whiff of their delicious clean scent. That was when I noticed that my mom was watching me, and I had just smelled my dad's still-stained underwear that was on top. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 449

You deserved it 11 395

Skittish

By Anonymous - 18/07/2023 22:00 - Netherlands - Hardenberg

Today, my dad came home and wanted to grab a glass. It wasn't in direct sight so he slammed the cupboard door so hard, I peed my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 613

You deserved it 190

Muddy

By >.> - 12/12/2013 05:31 - Canada - Chestermere

Today, my dad decided to clean his muddy shoes right beside me by clapping them together, causing mud to fly all over me. This wouldn't have been a problem had I not been wearing my white wedding dress just before getting married. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 998

You deserved it 3 881

Classic case of the Mondays

By testuser - 18/08/2025 18:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I spilled coffee on myself and now my brand new shirt is ruined, and I have to go to an important meeting immediately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 252

You deserved it 246

Whatcha been up to?

By Just another Dude - 02/10/2017 13:00

Today, I spilled vanilla yogurt on my pants while eating breakfast, but I forgot to clean it up. It left a very conspicuous white stain on my pants, that was there the entire day. I only noticed it when I looked in the mirror after getting home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 968

You deserved it 984

By inalotofpain - 16/04/2011 12:46 - United States

Today, while relaxing in the kitchen drinking coffee, my dad suddenly rushed in, knocking me over and causing me to spill boiling hot coffee all over myself. Then, my dad thought it would be a good idea to grab the sprayer from the sink and douse me with cold water in order to "put me out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 493

You deserved it 3 922

Spunky

By grimatwork - 01/11/2010 17:24 - United Kingdom

Today, after taking my jacket off at work, I found a large faint stain all across one side of my shirt. Turns out that my fiancé had used it to "clean up the bed." I am the manager of a supermarket with 40 employees. It was pretty obvious what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 469

You deserved it 5 453

Laundry drama

By Anonymous - 19/11/2020 05:08 - United States - San Mateo

Today, I did laundry with one of my new white sweaters and other light-colored clothes. After it all went through the dryer, I found out there are now dark shades on it and it looks like a years-old old sweater, and can't be cleaned. I didn't even get a chance to put it on once. FML

I agree, your life sucks 493

You deserved it 788

Can't handle my drinks

By Anonymous - 06/02/2025 07:00 - Philippines - San Jose del Monte

Today, I drank cocktails and shots. On the way home, I had to pee so bad that I only got to the front door and peed all over our carpet. My mom saw the whole thing and my dad saw the aftermath with the super drenched carpet and shoes. My mom had to mop the floor after I ran to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 753

Blush

By Anonymous - 12/11/2024 22:00 - United States

Today, I wore a new pair of white pants, feeling fancy. Halfway through the day, I discovered a ketchup stain that looked suspiciously like a heart right on the front. That explained why people kept giving me sympathetic nods as I walked by, probably thinking I'd spilled my heart on my sleeve… or my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 298

You deserved it 124

Next

Top comments

what 1

Friday 24 May 2019 20:40

Wash rinse and repeat

RichardPencil 30

Friday 24 May 2019 20:59

Let Dad clean it or buy you a new one.

Comments

what 1

Friday 24 May 2019 20:40

Wash rinse and repeat

RichardPencil 30

Friday 24 May 2019 20:59

Let Dad clean it or buy you a new one.

MidnaLink 33

Friday 24 May 2019 22:24

For a shirt?

RichardPencil 30

Saturday 25 May 2019 5:29

Yes, buy him a new shirt, not a new dad.

AmbrosiaFan 18

Friday 24 May 2019 22:20

I'm LMAO... I don't do white shirts... because it so easily shows dirt. Was it a uniform shirt? Time to acquire two of them if you haven't already.

Bubbilility 27

Saturday 25 May 2019 16:02

That's just straight up rude! Who does that to someone?

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

The Top

Today, some bloke pushed me to the floor and kicked me twice in the head so he could steal, no joke, the two Greggs pasties I just bought. He wasn’t homeless either, he had designer jeans and a giant iPhone, and he did it in broad daylight with witnesses. What the hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 163

You deserved it 90

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me when his so-called "ways to turn me on" didn't work. What were these ways? Flicking my nips and inserting his finger in my belly button. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 268

You deserved it 551

Today, I ran into my girlfriend by chance while out shopping. She looked different than usual. Maybe it was the wedding ring she was wearing, or how she had her arm around another gentleman, gee, I don't know. That's two years of my life wasted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 385

You deserved it 5 632

Today, I found out that the foundation I've been using for the past month isn't normal foundation, its skin darkening foundation. I look like an oompa loompa from the neck up. It won't go away for another month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 876

You deserved it 35 852

Today, I was having an intense erotic dream. It was going great until I thought, "I hope this isn't a dream." This caused me to wake up. This isn't the first time I've cockblocked myself in a dream. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 112

You deserved it 207

Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 677

You deserved it 10 391