Health Today, I shat a magnet. FML

How is this even an FML? You had to have known that you've eaten a magnet sometime in the past few days. That's not something that just slips your mind.

DrewsFML 8

Tuesday 27 September 2011 8:42

Shat a magnet? Oh that's attractive.

Freeze_fml 16

Tuesday 27 September 2011 8:44

ICP has left its mark.

Joshoa123 16

Tuesday 27 September 2011 8:46

There goes your magnetic personality.

Paulleh 0

Tuesday 27 September 2011 8:46

This has got to be the only FML on the site that has litterally made me laugh out loud

dc46290 8

Tuesday 27 September 2011 8:47

Too much iron in his diet

super3286 14

Tuesday 27 September 2011 8:49

I shat bricks after I read this :o

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my 97 year-old grandmother told me that if I’m not married and pregnant by the time she goes, I’ll be completely excluded from her will. She went on to say how shameful it is for a woman my age to be single, choosing college over a family. I’m 21 and studying to be an oncologist. FML

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Today, at four in the morning, I was asleep with my boyfriend beside me. I started yelling at him in my sleep and broke up with him. When I woke up, he was gone. FML

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Today, my boss was angry at me because I had filed a complaint about him refusing to change our phone service to something more reliable. Later, a customer called him and said I had hung up on him. I got fired. I didn't hang up on the customer, the phone service just dropped the call. FML

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Today, I was called to solve a problem question at the start of a lecture. I stupidly went up to the board before telling the lecturer in front of 300+ students that I had no Idea what he had been doing the whole week. The lecturer made a sneery comment about why some of us are blockheads. FML

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Today, I got married. I received a beautifully wrapped gift from my dad. I was full of excitement until I opened it and found two taxidermied rabbits. The ones I had when I was in the fifth grade. FML

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Today, I was at a party, and a cute girl in a skirt sat on my lap. We were flirting and I unfortunately got hard. She then stood up and yelled, "Are you getting hard? EW!" FML

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