Kids: Stolen valor

Stolen valor

By Anonymous - 15/07/2009 06:58 - Canada

Today, my husband rescued our daughter's cat from a tree. She spent the next hour clapping and telling me how much of a hero he was. Last night at 2 a.m., I was awoken by meowing and had to rescue the same cat from the same tree, in the dark, and halfway down he shit on me. No one called me a hero. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 991

You deserved it 5 964

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
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Same thing different taste

Come down

By Anonymous - 20/01/2015 20:24 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I spent a half hour trying to help my cat down after he got stuck in the tree on my lawn. I finally gave up and called a local tree care company to help. When I returned outside, I found my cat casually walking about by the door. The guy who showed up to help was not happy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 897

You deserved it 5 523

Merry Xmas

By Christmas sucks - 24/12/2012 01:03 - United States - Boston

Today, I was wrapping presents for my daughter, trying to be really quiet. Behind me, the cat decided to climb the tree, which then fell on top of me and I couldn't move. My daughter had to help me up. She now knows everything she's getting for Christmas this year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 901

You deserved it 4 776

Rescue cat

By crazycatlady - 04/02/2017 20:00 - United States - Charlotte

Today, my cat fell into the toilet, and I had to save him. I now have a soggy cat and scratched arms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 434

You deserved it 844

How dare you

By pissed off - 01/07/2012 01:00

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 519

You deserved it 2 635

Get back here!

By catgirl911 - 13/10/2009 01:44 - United States

Today, I woke up to see my cat crawling out my window onto the roof. Afraid he was going to jump to the ground, I crawled out my window as well. I caught him. The neighbors caught me in my underwear and bra yelling at my cat on the roof. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 196

You deserved it 25 175

By crazycat - 13/05/2011 16:23 - Canada

Today, in the early hours of the morning, my cat started scratching at my legs. I got out of bed and he raced me to the stairs, tripping me. I fell all the way down and landed in cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 638

You deserved it 5 852

By Anonymous - 28/12/2018 06:00 - United States - Pittsford

Today, my cat jumped on my shoulders, but stepped in my hood and choked me and when I panicked she dug her claws into my shoulders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 158

You deserved it 505

HUMAN! I NEED ATTENTION!

By Mur - 09/09/2023 22:00

Today, my girlfriend called me four times in a row at work. Worried, I stepped outside and answered the phone. Through tears, she screamed, "It's the cat!" Was he sick or hurt? "NO! He won't stop meowing!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 668

You deserved it 139

By MoncaBang - 29/01/2009 21:25 - United States

Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 697

You deserved it 3 457

Brave

By screw the cat - 24/07/2012 05:10 - United States - South Jordan

Today, I was at my girlfriend's house when we noticed her cat was missing. We saw it on the roof and so I thought I would try to look good by offering to go on the roof to retrieve it. The cat had climbed down when I got up there, and I have a fear of heights. Her mom had to help me down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 127

You deserved it 23 911

irishdubr 0

Wednesday 15 July 2009 16:11

Leave it in the tree, it will come down. Have u ever seen a cat skeleton in a tree?

bananapajama 0

Wednesday 15 July 2009 16:11

I guess she wasn't able to witness it so it didn't have such a big impact. maybe you should keep kitty inside!

Comments

jisaac09 25

Saturday 2 January 2010 20:15

Just my guess but is it really called being a hero if u do sumthing that dont need to be done??? I mean, would i be a hero if i walked over there, picked up a cat and brought it over her just cause it was meowing???? Not really, the cat really didnt need anything, cats have evolved to climb trees. I mean, i dont go picking up my grandma and carrying her all over the place cause shes in her rocking chair talking, cause i know she can get out of it....

Snow_Daisy 7

Thursday 11 February 2010 20:14

lmfao that's pretty effing funny..

XBCX96 4

Wednesday 3 March 2010 7:22

you werent called a hero? its probably because you had cat shit all over you

ghost010 6

Sunday 21 March 2010 4:25

The point of doing a good deed is not for the praise but for the fact that you did the right thing. Even if no one saw you, or even if the whole world saw you it doesn't change what you have to do.

danyfuckinheatle 0

Tuesday 18 May 2010 7:43

JELOUS

wintamint101 7

Friday 28 May 2010 13:14

this doesnt make sense, it says her husband rescued the cat, not the OP

Sersha88 0

Tuesday 6 July 2010 12:33

Rescue the cat from the tree........... have you ever seen a dead cat in a tree?

Chocolate_Chunk 2

Friday 17 September 2010 14:12

actually, it's "Poor me, I have to get up around 2 AM to climb a tree and get shat on as a thank you. And to make things worse, everyone is just too stupid to understand a bit of sarcasm"