Holidays, Christmas, Gifts Awkward Perfect!

Perfect!

BahHumbug - - United States - Painesville

Today, after weeks of keeping it a secret, I excitedly gave my boyfriend what I thought to be the perfect Christmas present. Turns out lock picking sets are illegal in Ohio. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

Pleased to meet you

DB. - - United States

Today, my parents met my boyfriend's parents for the first time… while they were bailing us out of jail. FML

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Just browsing

OneGirlsLife -

Today, someone tried to break into my car. They tried to do so by jamming a key into my lock, only for the key to break. I guess the key cut their hand, because I had the pleasure of finding the person's blood all over my passenger door. FML

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One day…

CaeliLady - - United States

Today, my friend and I were at the mall and saw a "Grow Your Own Boyfriend" toy. I remarked that I already had one of those, and she freaked out, very loudly and openly, about me "finally having a boyfriend". I had to embarrassingly explain I meant I had the toy... not an actual boyfriend. FML

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singlesoon - 25/08/2009 04:26 - Canada

Today, I bailed my soon to be ex-husband out of jail after he'd been arrested for soliciting. Soliciting an undercover cop. FML

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janae - 06/08/2018 23:30

Today, I discovered that I am pregnant. I questioned my boyfriend and he admitted to not using a condom because he thought we were just doing "practice sex". FML

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Scary!

Anonymous - - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, all because he's scared of my mother. FML

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The argument for fake IDs

bryans_fresh - - United States

Today, I wanted to use my gift card for a liquor store. I went to pay the cashier, who said he needed to see my license. I gave it to him, along with my gift card. After paying, he asked me if I wanted him to cut it up, since the card was now worthless. I said yes. He cut up the wrong card. FML

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Collector's item

Pon -

Today, my girlfriend bought me a new hockey jersey and donated my old one. My old one was signed. FML

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Treat yourself

birthday bash - - France

Today, it was my girlfriend's birthday. She decided that her "gift to herself" would be to leave the loser who has been holding her back for two years. Hello, my name is Ben, and I'm that loser. FML

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Secret

Anonymous - - United States - San Francisco

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of two years has a beautiful daughter. That's cool, except she's one year old. FML

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tigerisabelle 31

Monday 28 December 2015 9:34

Wait, why would you buy your boyfriend a lock-picking set? Was it part of one of those corny things where you're all like "now you hold the key to everywhere... including my heart..." Or does he just enjoy breaking into houses? So many unanswered questions!

INSEKTORADA 10

Monday 28 December 2015 9:45

Plot twist he is in prison.

tigerisabelle 31

Monday 28 December 2015 9:34

darkbob101 16

Tuesday 29 December 2015 4:53

I know personally, after playing a lot of stealth-based video games, I would love to try lock picking in real life. It is also a decently popular hobby.