Joe Bidet By userrrrr - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States Today, I found out that my girlfriend's idea of "washing her feet" is sticking her foot in the toilet and flushing. FML I agree, your life sucks 49 454 You deserved it 3 839 Share Tweet Share
Today, while I was on Spotify with smart shuffle enabled, it started playing a really stupid, but funny song I'd never heard in my life. I then looked at the cover and realized the song playing was AI-generated. I don't want to live on this planet anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 400 You deserved it 129
Today, I did a sprint in gym class. Despite being the skinniest in the class, I ran slower than everyone else, including two morbidly obese people. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 167 You deserved it 2 589
Today, as I listened to the guy I've been seeing pour his heart out to me, all I could think about was how much I needed to poop. FML I agree, your life sucks 6 744 You deserved it 1 545
Today, I finished booking the non-refundable cruise for my wife and I to the Bahamas. I did this after confirming once again that my mother could take care of our son while we're away. An hour after I paid, she called back saying she mistook the dates and can't do it anymore. FML I agree, your life sucks 34 166 You deserved it 2 667
Today, I saw my friend's car in front of school. I'd had a bad day and just wanted to talk with her. I got in and sat down, and felt something squish beneath me. Turns out it wasn't actually my friend's car, and I'd just sat on a random woman's cake. FML I agree, your life sucks 39 629 You deserved it 28 096
Today, I picked up an extra shift at the store. It was also the day the store's ventilation system shut down, resulting in carbon monoxide poisoning for me and two co-workers. FML I agree, your life sucks 42 805 You deserved it 3 016
There's a keeper!
Are you sure she wasn't joking... i mean... come on... who does that?