Crystal Ball Cat By FML Approved - 31/10/2017 03:00 Now stop trying to touch my belly and just go away! I agree, your life sucks 465 You deserved it 128 Share Tweet Share
Today, my brother told me that he needed to borrow a hammer, a chisel, and a drill just in case. I asked him if he was finally getting round to starting work on his apartment. Not at all, he was just going to crack open the coconut he'd just bought at the supermarket. FML I agree, your life sucks 541 You deserved it 51
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend saying she needed more phone credit, so I bought her more and got another message saying "Great, now I have enough credit for this..." as she spelled out a three page message breaking up with me. Yes, I paid for her to break up with me via text. FML I agree, your life sucks 80 883 You deserved it 8 161
Today, while working as a parking booth attendant, I decided to be nice and give a woman free parking. I said, "Give me a high five and I'll give you free parking, since I already did the paperwork." She said, "I'd rather pay," with a really disgusted look. I also had to redo the paperwork. FML I agree, your life sucks 44 659 You deserved it 8 578
Today, I got my grades back. They were all 98's and 99's with also a 104 (extra-credit). I got refused from entering an honors club, because it's "impossible to get above a hundred in a math class". I even got investigated for cheating. FML I agree, your life sucks 6 154 You deserved it 389
Today, and for the past month, I've been feeling lightheaded from a breathing problem. I've now been prescribed a medication to help with my anxiety and my breathing issue, which would in turn help stop me from getting so lightheaded. The side effect of said medication: lightheadedness. FML I agree, your life sucks 3 886 You deserved it 299
Today, I noticed how fucked up I am generally. When as I was at school, everyone thought I would be a scientist at some prestigious institute somewhere, but now I'm actually homeless in Moscow, I live off shoplifting, sleeping at Burger King Restaurants, on buses, and in parks. I never do drugs or drink. This sucks! FML I agree, your life sucks 1 045 You deserved it 298