kayma4139

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Kayma4139's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 14/05/2009 17:46 - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

agreeclassic 20 058

vote type 1 104 350

Jam it in my ears

By missmom83 - this FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Torrington

Today, my toddler found my daughter's recorder from third grade and figured out how to play the highest-pitched note. Of course, my daughter pulls out her trombone to have a jam session. And I'm out of Ibuprofen. FML

agreeclassic 41 609

vote type 1 5 674

By Anonymous - 20/04/2014 04:03 - United States - Meridian

Today, my guide dog sneezed so hard that it slammed its head on the floor and knocked itself out. I have to trust this dog with my life. FML

agreeclassic 57 300

vote type 1 5 054

By YellowKettleBell - 02/04/2014 02:21 - United States - Houston

Today, I have pink eye. Four weeks ago I had scabies. I'm an elementary school teacher, and I'm apparently under attack from biological weapons: my students. FML

agreeclassic 43 030

vote type 1 4 404

YellowKettleBell app_comment_confession_title

YellowKettleBell 31

Wednesday 2 April 2014 23:45

Op here....unfortunately, many kids don't come from homes that are clean and hygienic. That's especially true in economically disadvantaged homes, from which most of my kids come. Some I can tell don't bathe or wash their clothes regularly. Yes, this is my first year. Many teachers said they had similar experiences starting out.

By Bandking - 17/03/2014 21:48 - United States - Cleveland

Today, I marched in the St. Patrick's day parade. My horn has an inconveniently-placed spit valve that has to be drained frequently. At the end, I discovered every time I emptied it, it would spray all over the front of my pants. I marched an entire parade looking like I pissed my pants. FML

agreeclassic 38 168

vote type 1 5 487