Slaughterhim

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Miami, Florida
30 years-old
Thursday 12 October 1995
couple

A propos de Slaughterhim

Hey, I'm Jessica :D

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Slaughterhim's favorite FMLs

By CrapFeet - 11/12/2009 14:11 - Malaysia

Today, I saw my favourite shirt on the floor of my dorm's bathroom. Feeling too lazy to bend down, I used my feet to "flick" the shirt up. Apparently, some drunkard took a dump on the floor and used my shirt to cover it up. I now have shit all over my feet, hands and the wall in front of me. FML

agreeclassic 33 404

vote type 1 6 603

CrapFeet app_comment_confession_title

CrapFeet 0

Saturday 12 December 2009 18:35

OP here. Well of course I cleaned it up before typing, any idiot would do that. FYI, yes I did deserve it because I would normally remove all personal belongings before leaving but for this once, I left my shirt on the hook behind the door because I was rushing for time and I just showered so I needed time to fix my hair, wear my contacts etc before leaving and I simply forgot to take it :( The stench wasn't there, no idea why. Need details? lol ok, maybe because the outer part of the turd hardened, leaving the inner part slightly soft and moist, thus 'locking' the smell in perhaps? And yes, I did clean the friggin wall..the bathroom was shared between me and two other girls. I know the girls won't clean it, so...

By lamed - 04/12/2009 22:01 - United States

Today, I stopped by the gun store to pick up a new concealed weapon for protection. As I was leaving the store, a man came up behind me, hit me with a crowbar, and stole my gun. FML

agreeclassic 38 228

vote type 1 14 802

By wearashirt - 04/12/2009 07:55 - United States

Today, I had to take a test that's required to pass the class. The test administor told us that those of us who were wearing hoodies would have to take them off. I would have taken mine off, but I was only wearing a bra underneath. There's no other days I can reschedule the test. FML

agreeclassic 37 027

vote type 1 14 465

By urinanalysis - 03/12/2009 16:08 - Canada

Today, I went to get blood and urine tests done before work. As I was attempting to aim into the cup, I lost balance and slipped. I ended up peeing on my sleeves and my pants. I was late for work and I smelled like pee. FML

agreeclassic 29 383

vote type 1 7 314

By Hth - 28/10/2008 00:13 - United States

Today, I farted A LOT during an exam, all silent, so I figured I should be OK. Then I looked around and everybody was suffocating and giving me sly looks. I'm now known to everyone in the department as SuperFart. FML

agreeclassic 18 339

vote type 1 43 763