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This was actually my FML, everyone. No, it wasn't a pedophile, THANK GOD. It was a couple, and they said "Umm...can we help you?" and I was like, "Sorry! I thought you were my friends!" Then got out awkwardly. They had the same car. It wasn't my fault.

By Proudlyintp - 13/08/2010 06:07 - United States

Today, I went on a blind date for coffee. He was smart, good looking, and friendly. While we were talking about our respective families it became abundantly clear that I have heard these stories before. I realized that 6 months earlier I had been dumped by his brother after sleeping with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 982

You deserved it 34 351

proudlyintp tells us more.

proudlyintp 0

Sunday 15 August 2010 1:42

I am the OP and am going to clarify the original post because in trying to keep to the letter limit, the tenses got confusing. I originally dated the brother "A" for a month and half. He has a very common last name. After we finally slept together he immediately went missing, which happened to be before I could meet a large portion of his family. Now 6 months later on a different blind date with brother "B" we were talking about respective families. Almost immediately the stories started to ring very familiar. He was telling a story about his brother who worked for him and it became abundantly clear that I had heard the same story only from a different perspective. Since there is a yuck factor with dating brothers and I am not really into creating family drama needlessly I am bowing out.

By anyomous - 26/06/2010 03:19 - United States

Today, I bought tickets for my friends and me to go to a concert. While I was in the shower, they ditched me and took my girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 903

You deserved it 4 448

Making a scene

By becca1417 - 01/09/2009 22:21 - United States

Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed, "Holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 778

You deserved it 45 409

By Kendra_Nine - 16/01/2013 18:28 - Canada - Toronto

Today, my 8-year-old sister matter-of-factly said that she's going to get married before me if I don't stop wearing track pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 730

You deserved it 31 106

Pubeblocked

By PubelishedAuthor - 15/03/2010 06:00 - United States

Today, I learned that a few pubes on your bed can stop you from getting laid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 773

You deserved it 33 363

By dani1104 - 29/01/2010 08:49 - United States

Today, my window fell out of the wall, landed on my head, and shattered. I waited 6 hours to get 23 stitches in the emergency room. When I got home, I found a bill. I owe my landlord $130 to replace the window. They won't fix it until I pay up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 886

You deserved it 2 311

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dani1104 0

Saturday 30 January 2010 1:47

So I'm not lying. The window repairman came today (after I paid $130) and said that some spring or something in the window frame was worn out. Boston had some very strong winds the day the window fell out, which pushed it out of the frame. I was on the floor doing a puzzle of Fenway Park if you needed to know.

By Anonymous - 23/01/2011 00:12 - United States

Today, my girlfriend, who's on a diet, refused to give me a blow job because my sperm would "add useless calories" to her day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 577

You deserved it 14 776