Students and Kids: Today, my daughter asked me the difference between "their" and...

By Anonymous - 26/02/2014 21:42 - United States - Northampton

Today, my daughter asked me the difference between "their" and "they're". This is the same child I've been spending thousands of dollars on to send to law school. FML

agreeclassic 45 722

vote type 1 6 372

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Rip off

By sourgirl101 - 04/01/2022 04:59

Today, I learned that my daughter pocketed the money I'd paid so she could go to college. FML

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Whatever it is, it's not enough

By mother of an idiot - 09/07/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, my second-grade daughter asked her teacher how much money she makes. FML

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Who's FICA? Why's he getting all my money?

By Anonymous - 31/08/2022 10:00

Today, my daughter is mad sulking because she got her first wage today and learned a bunch of new words like national insurance, pension contributions, taxes, automatic student loan repayments, and so on. She actually thought she got to keep ALL the money she earned, and is taking it out on us. FML

agreeclassic 916

vote type 1 475

By anon - 16/12/2015 15:28 - Australia - Salisbury

Today, my daughter asked me if we could adopt a child. I said no, since we can't afford to support another child. She then asked me if she could just adopt another dad instead. FML

agreeclassic 22 147

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By Anonymous - 15/10/2012 10:28 - United States - Richmond

Today, I learned from my daughter's teacher that she has been wearing the same shirt for the past few weeks, ever since we had a fight about how I don't pay attention to her. FML

agreeclassic 8 489

vote type 1 63 351

You played yourself

By Anonymous - 17/09/2025 00:00

Today, my idiot daughter is sat next to me crying because she took her ex to court for child support, convinced she was gonna get paid, even though her kids live with their dad full time. Now she's paying HIM child support and can’t afford her flat anymore, so she wants to move in with me. FML

agreeclassic 462

vote type 1 136

By Oy Vay - 14/11/2016 06:09 - United States - Sparkill

Today, my daughter, whom I consigned a credit card for, told me she was in a bit of financial trouble. It turns out that she was trying to pay off her credit card with the same credit card her bill was for, and couldn't figure out why it wasn't working. FML

agreeclassic 9 921

vote type 1 1 220

You snooze, you lose

By Anonymous - 07/10/2025 00:00

Today, my daughter has spent the last few hours moaning that the boy she’s known since they were 4 years-old got a girlfriend instead of asking her out. She’s known him for almost 20 years. If she liked him all that time, she should have asked him out herself instead of moaning at me. FML

agreeclassic 454

vote type 1 98

By Anonymous - 09/04/2016 13:12 - United Kingdom - London

Today, my daughter and her "friend" kept using crude euphemisms right in front of me, thinking I was too old or too stupid to figure out what they meant. I nearly had an aneurysm when she told him he could put his "pencil" in her "sharpener" next time they studied together. FML

agreeclassic 27 197

vote type 1 2 615

Digging

By Anonymous - 03/04/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my daughter is such a greedy idiot. Her ex was voluntarily giving her over £1000 for the kid but she decided she wanted more, and dragged him to child support court. She’s now only getting about £500 and her ex, who formerly had a great relationship with her, now hates her guts. Idiot. FML

agreeclassic 661

vote type 1 187

712sash 26

Thursday 27 February 2014 5:59

"You're" daughter is going to be fine :)

Bloink 25

Thursday 27 February 2014 6:09

one who asks questions is foolish for five minutes, one who doesn't is foolish forever

Comments

itssnotfunny 24

Monday 13 February 2017 22:20

Tell her their stupid and it's they're fault for not knowing.

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Top

Today, I discovered that I'm actually descended from wealthy and powerful landowners in Bangladesh. I live in a two-bedroom rented flat and work as an admin in a daycare. FML

agreeclassic 733

vote type 1 199

Today, I learned a hard lesson: when you order 12 artificial sweeteners and 6 packets of raw sugar with your home-delivered Starbucks coffee so that you can have a small hoard to sweeten up the coffee you already have at home, they just may put all 18 items in the cup and stir it up to your apparent liking. FML

agreeclassic 308

vote type 1 2 155

Today, after waking up to a spilled bottle of juice on my clothes, I heard my ex died. Whilst baking cookies to distract myself, I melted my work laptop on the toaster. FML

agreeclassic 954

vote type 1 316

Today, I rushed home because my wife called to let me know she was feeling horny for the first time after getting over a bad flu. I walked in the door and surprise surprise, her sister had called round, wanting sympathy after her latest fuckbuddy dumped her. Romantic mood ruined. FML

agreeclassic 2 310

vote type 1 214

Today, I crossed the street at a crosswalk and someone in a big pickup truck swerved to try to hit me. This has happened to me multiple times. FML

agreeclassic 556

vote type 1 117

Today, my girlfriend who trained me at the job we both work at received a promotion, which left a spot for advancement. I was chosen for the position, and now the guy she's been cheating on me with is training me. Congrats. FML

agreeclassic 970

vote type 1 135