Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't... - FML

By wish.was.single - 25/01/2012 18:33 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend kept whining at me, asking why I wouldn't have sex with him, seemingly not caring that my parents were in the room. FML

agreeclassic 42 126

vote type 1 5 693

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By Anonymous - 22/05/2010 23:22 - United States

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Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

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Today, my boyfriend and I heard my parents going at it upstairs. He said, "sounds like they're having more fun than we did." To make it worse, he crept to their door and put his ear to it, telling me what he heard. FML

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By XxDiabolikalXx - 24/08/2010 07:30 - France

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Today, while having dinner, my boyfriend decided to tell everyone about our sex life. It wouldn't have been too bad except my father was sitting right next to me. My boyfriend's excuse was that he wanted to make my dad laugh. He didn't laugh. FML

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By Passive ass aggressor - 08/04/2021 02:00

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Today, my boyfriend hasn’t asked for sex in a while, like months, and when I asked him about it he admitted that every day I shout at him, snap at him or act bitchy about anything not his fault, he has a wank and goes to sleep rather than bother asking me for sex. FML

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By Anonymous - 19/02/2011 05:22 - United States

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Today, I went to my boyfriend's house and sat around while he played video games. He turned to me and could see I was annoyed. Then he told his friends on XBox Live that he needed a 10 minute break to have sex with me. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

Bolter197 0

Thursday 26 January 2012 0:08

Don't date douchebags.

yankfan89 27

Thursday 26 January 2012 0:10

Don't sleep with him for a month for being a whiny bitch.

Comments

AloysiusWeasley 15

Saturday 10 March 2012 5:51

"Because you are an insufferable, whiny little boy. Now remove yourself before I squash you under my boot." Remember, the tone here has to be icy and dripping with disdain. If it doesn't crawl away grovelling, smash various soft parts with the heel of your foot until it does.

laaryssa 21

Wednesday 24 July 2013 7:44

I

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 18 October 2016 23:37

Dad get the shotgun....

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Today, I told my boyfriend he looked like a Greek god. He looked confused and said, "Thanks, I guess? But aren’t they all fat and drunk?" I’m dating a man who thinks Greek gods are just overweight party animals. FML

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Today, I found my 6-year-old daughter recording herself on her little tape recorder. When I asked her what she was up to, she replied in her cute little voice, "I'm recording myself so you'll have a souvenir when I'm dead." FML

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Today, I was browsing porn in my room, when my dad barged in. I quickly switched to another tab, only to see it was parked on another porn page. I had another browser window open, so I switched to that. More porn. My dad said, "Riiiggghhhttt... You need help, son." FML

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Today, my dad and I were at the grocery store buying toilet paper. As we walk out I see these two attractive guys that I know. My dad gets that I think they're cute, so he shouts "Hey babe, how's your stomach feeling now? Will this be enough for you?" They walk away laughing. FML

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