Love: Today, it's been a year since I've been with my girlfriend, and...

By True Story - 29/08/2011 12:46 - Canada

Today, it's been a year since I've been with my girlfriend, and I think that I hate more things about her than I like. For instance, how she likes to throw furniture at me. FML

agreeclassic 31 123

vote type 1 10 275

End-of-year festivities: New Year's Eve fun and frolics
End the year on a high note with anecdotes where every New Year's Eve firecracker is synonymous with laughter! More…

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TikTok trending

By Anonymous - 18/06/2023 18:00

Today, my girlfriend insisted on doing some stupid TikTok where we say one thing we’d change about each other. She hates that I don’t always put plates straight in the dishwasher. I hate that she gets her makeup all over the sink without cleaning it. She got mad and threw a book at my head. FML

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The horror!

By Anonymous - 24/01/2023 02:00

Today, it's been a week since my girlfriend moved into my house and I have now discovered she is one of those evil, unnatural beings: a Morning Person. FML

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Coercive freak

By Anonymous - 14/08/2023 18:02 - United States - Towaco

Today, my girlfriend hates my friends and I'm not allowed to talk or hang out with them. She keeps threatening my job. The only reason I'm still with her is because she will try and get me fired. She's crazy and so is the rest of her family. FML

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I never thought this happened in real life

By Keith - 19/05/2022 10:00

Today, and since we met, my girlfriend has forced me to change my hair, clothing and jewellery, and my diet. She has changed basically everything about me. Then this morning she dumped me because I'm "not the guy she fell in love with a year ago". I'm not even upset because its too funny. FML

agreeclassic 1 010

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By poopydaddy - 03/05/2013 11:32 - Canada - Oakville

Today, I found out that every time my girlfriend takes a big dump, she pretends as if she's giving birth and screams uncontrollably. I just moved in with her. FML

agreeclassic 53 899

vote type 1 5 667

By killmenow - 19/02/2009 21:52 - United States

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me after a year of living together. She told me that she met someone else and wanted to move out. She moved out... but moved her things into my roommate's bedroom. FML

agreeclassic 64 329

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Anger issues

By Flash - 25/07/2021 17:31 - India - Bangalore

Today, I found out why my girlfriend has been angry with me ever since I moved in with her. Apparently, she is pissed that I taught her cat how to play fetch and keep treating him like a dog. FML

agreeclassic 1 008

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Time to move on

By Anonymous - 22/02/2023 10:00 - United States - Boulder

Today, it's been a year since the girl I'm madly in love with completely cut off all communication with me. She called me crying a year ago, saying she couldn't do the long-distance, unaware I was planning on moving closer to her. Not once has she reached out, and has a girlfriend now. I think about her every night. FML

agreeclassic 718

vote type 1 334

Get your act together

By Z…… - 14/11/2012 00:43 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML

agreeclassic 9 788

vote type 1 36 046

Time to bail

By Anonymous - 18/09/2024 08:00 - United States - Denver

Today, my girlfriend likes playing games on her phone more than she likes me. FML

agreeclassic 397

vote type 1 139

springbok_fml 2

Monday 29 August 2011 15:50

break up?

wmsdubstep 6

Monday 29 August 2011 15:51

Get something bigger and slap her with it!

Comments

Deaded1 12

Monday 29 August 2011 18:08

Then the sex must not be that ncie anymore. Move on buddy boy.

Kendall_Cali97 8

Monday 29 August 2011 18:09

Break up with that chick, she has issues!

USMC12994 1

Monday 29 August 2011 18:10

Fourthly, she could start driving.

xoxo_cherri_xoxo 6

Monday 29 August 2011 18:13

A year tolerating this shit? The sex must be amazing...

xoxo_cherri_xoxo 6

Monday 29 August 2011 18:13

A year tolerating this shit? The sex must be amazing...

mistyglam 0

Monday 29 August 2011 18:15

A year without getting with ur girl, that's not ur girlfriend it's someone elses!

smilez614 1

Monday 29 August 2011 18:15

Dump the B****!!!

itschrisssybro 8

Monday 29 August 2011 18:17

Whoa, furniture... Leave her already!

IndigoAcrylic 9

Monday 29 August 2011 18:19

High 5 ! I'm from Canada too! ;D

Daralea 21

Tuesday 30 August 2011 20:33

It's a big ass country, get over it.

music87 14

Monday 29 August 2011 18:20

Looks like it might be time to get rid of her, OP.

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, I was at the laundromat doing laundry with my mom when the guy running the place asked if we were "together". I thought this was just because of Covid and social distancing, but it turns out he thought my mom was my wife. FML

agreeclassic 835

vote type 1 103

Today, I woke up early to weird scratching and smacking noises. After gathering enough courage to check what it was, I found out it was just an ant stuck on a piece of paper. FML

agreeclassic 2 223

vote type 1 347

Today, I went to dinner with my friend and his family. I went to the men's room at the same time as his father, and as we peed next to each other in adjacent urinals the father looked over at me and said, "Don't worry, I've seen smaller." FML

agreeclassic 39 397

vote type 1 3 050

Today, I paid $800.00 towards my student loans. That was the minimum payment. FML

agreeclassic 1 936

vote type 1 443

Today, I phoned my bank. The person wouldn't speak to me about my account as I "sound female" despite being a year 30-old-male. They had to get a supervisor and listen to recordings of past calls to believe me. This isn't the first time I've been mistaken for a girl on the phone. FML

agreeclassic 4 067

vote type 1 305

Today, I went to a family gathering and was asked by multiple relatives why I was still single. Trying to lighten the mood, I joked that in fact I do have a secret admirer. My little cousin yelled out, "Is it your cat?" He was right, even though, come to think about it, I'm not sure my cat even likes me all that much. FML

agreeclassic 568

vote type 1 168

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