Intimacy: Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when...

By Anonymous - 02/06/2012 10:24 - United Kingdom - Northampton

Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML

agreeclassic 18 266

vote type 1 32 766

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And they say romance is dead…

By BaconBreathBlonde - 30/10/2009 00:33 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out, holding hands, and he was playing with a strand of my hair. I thought the whole thing was very romantic. He then said he loved how my mouth tasted like bacon. FML

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By ch4nny - 29/08/2014 01:47 - Australia - Sydney

Today, my boyfriend was stroking my stomach and looking into my eyes. It was very romantic, until he grabbed my love handles and said, "Mmmm... bacon..." FML

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By cortanaisahobot - 19/07/2012 20:29 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I told my boyfriend I wanted to spice up our sex life. He suggested incorporating bacon. He was serious. FML

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What a Q-tip

By Anonymous - 25/06/2013 16:21 - United States - Flowery Branch

Today, I heard my boyfriend making the same noises while cleaning out his ears as the ones he makes whenever we have sex. FML

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By Anonymous - 06/06/2009 17:38 - United States

Today, my boyfriend went to the aquarium. We were noticing the fishy smell, and I had made a comment about it. Then my boyfriend slowly, and seductively whispers into my ear, "It sort of reminds me of how you smell." FML

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By confused - 28/09/2011 04:55 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend told me that having sex with me was as good as eating crispy bacon. I don't know if I should feel complimented. FML

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By merpaderp14 - 09/09/2013 06:15 - Canada

Today, my boyfriend found out it makes a funny fart sound when he blows hard into my mouth in the middle of making out. I can't get him to stop doing it every time we kiss. FML

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By FYLyfer - 26/10/2009 21:34 - United States

Today, while at Wendy's with my boyfriend, I realized that he made more pleasure sounds when eating his Baconator than he did while sleeping with me. FML

agreeclassic 22 051

vote type 1 5 618

By nick - 27/06/2016 03:44 - United States - Highland Park

Today, my girlfriend started making pig noises during sex. FML

agreeclassic 15 498

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By Indigo_Kitten - 08/08/2010 01:05 - United States

Today, my husband discovered that whispering anything in my ear will turn me on. He turned to me and whispered 'cheeseburger' in my ear. Unfortunately, I moaned. Now he now laughs about it with our roommate. FML

agreeclassic 32 005

vote type 1 19 073

Shayton 12

Saturday 2 June 2012 16:18

Bacon=sex in your mouth

tony1891 22

Saturday 2 June 2012 16:18

gotta love Bacon.

Comments

JoeParris 1

Tuesday 12 June 2012 13:49

Doesn't matter, had sex?

RemixV4 1

Wednesday 13 June 2012 2:39

I'd have done the same thing.

Lilyracheled 5

Friday 15 June 2012 10:45

I'm impressed that you only told him this today, but he's had enough chances to make it a regular thing.

nesteremily 31

Saturday 30 June 2012 13:46

that's exactly something my BF would do....

onorexveritas 23

Wednesday 4 July 2012 8:19

that's hilarious lol

krazy_bitch 0

Sunday 15 July 2012 2:07

Bacon = sex in a skillet ;D

DinosaursAreCute 0

Thursday 9 August 2012 1:22

Best post ever made XD it bfs halarious

scenekid06 5

Sunday 19 August 2012 10:08

well..... maybe you shouldn't have told him that there OP

Fatmangotmypie1 7

Monday 8 October 2012 16:27

Hey that'd set me off

thestoryofmylyf 20

Wednesday 31 October 2012 20:57

Lol, sorry but thts kinda funny

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Today, as I was driving to work, I got a flat tire. While attempting to replace said tire, I got mugged. The guy took all my money, my iPod, cellphone, and CDs. When I finally called my boss to explain my situation, he fired me. Why? Because I was late and had an "overactive imagination." FML

agreeclassic 39 049

vote type 1 2 513

Today, when drunk, I became OCD about everything and spent 3 hours making sure that the books on my shelves were straight. I thought that being drunk was supposed to be fun. FML

agreeclassic 28 026

vote type 1 9 923

Today, after supporting my girlfriend for over a year in her endeavour to lose weight, exercise more, and eat better, my now-slender girlfriend dumped me, because she's found someone "better" than me. FML

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Today, 50,000 copies of the new edition of the town's phone book came out. I manage a pizza place and bought a full menu ad. Apparently the ad designer got confused, as they placed my cell phone number in huge bold letters at the bottom of the ad instead of the store's phone number. FML

agreeclassic 37 572

vote type 1 3 681

Today, I brought my girlfriend over to her first dinner with my family. My gramps spent the entire dinner telling my girlfriend how the Illuminati are plotting to take over the world and use microchips to control everyone. So much for being taken seriously now. FML

agreeclassic 27 530

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Today, I called my boyfriend over and over again and he never answered. His mom just called me and asked how I was holding up. I asked her what she meant and she had to tell me he checked himself into rehab because he was addicted to heroin. FML

agreeclassic 37 378

vote type 1 3 770

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