Miscellaneous: Today, I realized that in my relationship with my significant...

By Damnit - 17/11/2011 18:11 - United States

Today, I realized that in my relationship with my significant other, the roles are switched. We went out for a nice dinner, I paid, and when we got home he "had a headache" and asked for an aspirin so he could go to sleep. FML

agreeclassic 30 260

vote type 1 7 000

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Stinky. - 09/04/2012 03:29 - United States - Chicago

Today, my boyfriend was complaining about how we never see the movies he wants to see. So I took him to the movies, and he picked which one. Then he fell asleep. FML

agreeclassic 25 727

vote type 1 2 748

By jgboy - 14/09/2014 15:32 - United States - Franklin Park

Today, I took my girlfriend of a year out on a date, a nice fancy dinner and a movie. After dinner, I said that I was feeling sick and just wanted to go home. I didn't have the heart to tell her that dinner was so expensive that I didn't have money for the movie. FML

agreeclassic 48 220

vote type 1 9 517

By anonymous001 - 08/01/2013 19:58 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I went to the movies with my crush, who had asked me out on a date. Assuming he'd pay, I left my money at home. When the time came to buy the tickets, he only bought one for himself. FML

agreeclassic 25 932

vote type 1 68 919

A step too far

By Anonymous - 10/12/2010 02:23 - United States

Today, one my friends died. All my crying gave me a headache, so I asked my boyfriend to bring me some aspirin. My headache didn't go away. Instead, I got diarrhea because my boyfriend gave me laxatives instead of aspirin as a "joke" to cheer me up. FML

agreeclassic 59 019

vote type 1 4 399

Too much of a good thing

By tryingtoberomantic - 28/09/2019 14:00 - Australia

Today, I took my boyfriend out to dinner to an expensive restaurant. He overate, and now I have to nurse him through food poisoning. FML

agreeclassic 1 446

vote type 1 261

Wrench in the works

By bluskyz1979 - 17/05/2016 15:32 - United States - Cypress

Today, my boyfriend and I were on a date and he starts complaining about how his back is hurting him. He complains the whole evening. Fast forward to later that night, we are in bed so I ask him if he was feeling OK. He says, "I guess so. I'm just confused about my feelings for you." FML

agreeclassic 12 666

vote type 1 1 040

By anyoi - 25/04/2012 22:43 - United States - Rocklin

Today, I took my boyfriend to meet my parents over dinner. During the meal, he excused himself to the bathroom, and when he didn't come back after a few minutes, I went to check up on him. I ended up finding him in the living room, pocketing a pack of ambien from my mom's bag. FML

agreeclassic 29 348

vote type 1 3 443

Not a med student

By indefiniteforest - this FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff - United States - Hillsboro

Today, my roommate was complaining about a headache, so I offered her some aspirin. She looked at me like I was stupid and said, "Uh… That stuff's only for heart attacks." I'm living with an idiot. FML

agreeclassic 7 588

vote type 1 623

By really - 07/11/2014 00:30 - United States

Today, while cuddling with my boyfriend, he got up and said he needed to go home because he was tired and just wanted to relax and watch TV. That's what we were doing. FML

agreeclassic 37 061

vote type 1 4 371

Date night

By avaiia - 09/08/2016 20:32 - United States - Chicago

Today, I had a first date. We really hit it off and wound up watching movies together and talking late into the night. I ignored a developing migraine all night, then tried to leave hurriedly when it got bad. He stalled me leaving by asking what's wrong. I started vomiting. FML

agreeclassic 14 801

vote type 1 1 615

DocBastard 38

Thursday 17 November 2011 22:45

Welcome to the 21st century where people are people and there are no "roles".

powderbluetang 11

Thursday 17 November 2011 22:41

Damn, they've learned our tricks!

Comments

PissyBitch Daily 13

Friday 8 September 2017 2:50

The love is gone. If I were you, I'd start looking for a new "significant other."

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous My ex Stalker Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I received my employee ID, which I have to wear at all times at my new job. The only problem is that in my photo, I look like a donkey having a seizure. Customers keep snickering at it, and my boss thinks I posed like that deliberately. FML

agreeclassic 37 831

vote type 1 4 581

Today, my professor cancelled class so I turned off my alarm. When I woke up, I checked my email again. There was no email from my professor. It was a dream. FML

agreeclassic 43 328

vote type 1 6 493

Today, I got stuck in the bathroom with no toilet paper. I had to reach into my small trash can and use soiled toilet paper to clean myself. When I went to flush the toilet, I noticed three unused rolls of toilet paper sitting on the counter. FML

agreeclassic 20 838

vote type 1 52 361

Today, I had to sell over $400 worth of china at a flea market. I barely got paid enough to refill my gas tank. FML

agreeclassic 39 374

vote type 1 7 900

Today, I never wanted a wife, so of course I got married. I never wanted kids, so of course my unwanted wife insisted we have two. My mother-in-law, who I wish daily would get hit by a bus, just got hired at my workplace. My only pleasure in life is fishing and my kids just broke my only rod. FML

agreeclassic 735

vote type 1 4 393

Today, while taking a bus full of loud, rambunctious elementary children to school, the bus slowly slid off the road into a ditch. After waiting 30 minutes that felt like hours, I saw the tow truck arriving from the opposite direction also slide slowly off the roadway into the opposite ditch. FML

agreeclassic 22 523

vote type 1 1 481