Transportation, Dogs and Cars: Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing...

By hakura madada - 22/06/2012 19:41 - Japan - Tokyo

Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML

agreeclassic 9 256

vote type 1 27 639

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Road rage

By fUcKOAHdSAjl - 16/08/2013 18:41 - United States - Manchester

Today, my dog was riding my car's passenger seat. He clambered over onto my lap, causing me to lose control of the wheel for a few seconds. As I tried to knock him off me, I lost track of my speed, and ended up being pulled over for reckless driving. FML

agreeclassic 26 523

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By fufu_mutt - 15/12/2010 04:24 - United States

Today, I was driving with my dog. Looking out the half-open window he stepped on the switch, the window went up, causing his head to get stuck. I looked down and he had scared the shit out of himself, all over my shirt. FML

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By ConfusedGinger - 10/11/2016 11:50 - United States - Downingtown

Today, my dog pooped. In my lap. While I was driving. FML

agreeclassic 8 889

vote type 1 2 308

By ej6901 - 23/06/2015 20:00 - United States - Ventnor City

Today, I left my dog in my car for 5 minutes while I ran into a store. The car was running so he was fine, the thing that wasn't so fine is that when I walked out my car wasn't there. My dog somehow moved my car into the middle of a intersection, almost causing an accident. FML

agreeclassic 22 828

vote type 1 19 162

By Anonymous - 09/03/2011 09:52 - India

Today, while stuck in a traffic jam, my son silently changed my gear to reverse. FML

agreeclassic 43 936

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Bad boy

By VtecKickIn - this FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was driving home with my girlfriend. As we turned onto our block, she shrieked that our dog was running down the street and into traffic. I jumped out of the moving car and chased him for about a mile, only to give up, go home, and find out it wasn't our dog. FML

agreeclassic 33 243

vote type 1 5 810

Magic moment

By spongebob squarepants - 28/02/2018 01:30

Today, I rear-ended someone while trying to watch my odometer hit 80,000 miles. FML

agreeclassic 1 594

vote type 1 7 422

Save the doggo

By JC - 19/10/2009 06:40 - United States

Today, I was driving down the road when a dog suddenly ran across the street. In attempt to spare its life, I swerved to the side of the road and rear-ended another car. The car I hit belonged the family who owned the dog. Now I have to pay them because I saved their dog's life. FML

agreeclassic 39 381

vote type 1 5 967

By vstan - 25/08/2010 00:48 - United States

Today, I swerved off the road and hit a tree in order to avoid hitting a dog that came out of nowhere. Don't worry, I didn't hit him. The person behind me did, though. FML

agreeclassic 39 492

vote type 1 5 124

Murderer!

By Puppy_Killer - 16/12/2020 23:02 - Australia

Today, I was backing out of my garage when my neighbour's collie ran behind my car. Unfortunately, I didn't see it, but I heard a thump. They were out, so I rushed him to the vet's. I was upset, and I guess I was driving too fast and didn't see that another dog was crossing the road. I killed two dogs today. FML

agreeclassic 1 491

vote type 1 459

drewnewton 0

Saturday 23 June 2012 2:48

not much of an fml for you as for it is the dog

nelds 12

Saturday 23 June 2012 2:47

Poor puppy :( :(

Comments

beeanay 4

Saturday 23 June 2012 6:26

Lol

ZeroIce 12

Saturday 23 June 2012 6:53

Jeff Dunham anyone?

FableofAvel938 6

Saturday 23 June 2012 6:54

You have to wonder sometimes the legitimacy of these FMLs.. this's got Jeff Dunham written all over it.

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Top

Today, I found out the hard way that my girlfriend lied about being on the pill four months ago. FML

agreeclassic 38 050

vote type 1 8 352

Today, I found out that the squeaking I've heard for the past three months, that I thought was my guinea pig, is actually my girlfriend cheating on me with my older brother. FML

agreeclassic 76 652

vote type 1 7 357

Today, around 12 a.m., my pet parrot said a sentence I've never heard him say before. Usually this would be exciting, but considering he said, 'I killed the bird', and that one of my two love birds mysteriously died a few days ago, it's safe to say I'm now terrified. FML

agreeclassic 26 776

vote type 1 1 792

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Why? Because apparently her friends have seen me hanging out with a hot girl, giving her long hugs and making her laugh. That "hot girl" is my sister, who got back from studying abroad a week ago. FML

agreeclassic 38 898

vote type 1 2 762

Today, I had to drink the most vile and disgusting medicinal treatments I could ever imagine. Then I had to drink it again when I threw up the first batch. FML

agreeclassic 41 626

vote type 1 4 661

Today, at 2 in the morning, my water broke. I called my mom and woke her up to come watch our older kid, while my husband and I went to the hospital. After being tested at the hospital, I was told I had just peed myself. FML

agreeclassic 47 043

vote type 1 9 000