Animals: Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone...

By zzfreakshow - 15/10/2013 00:16 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I fell asleep while at the beach with friends. Someone thought it would be funny to put chunks of bread on and around my junk. Seagulls have sharp beaks. FML

agreeclassic 44 851

vote type 1 5 049

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By Anonymous - 13/08/2011 19:12 - United States

Today, after pulling an all-nighter, I fell asleep at the beach. My friends took the opportunity to bury me in the sand, place food all around me, and wait for a flock of hungry seagulls to attack me. To top it off, they taped it all. FML

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By ihateseagulls - 07/04/2011 23:28 - United States

Today, while at the beach, my little sister thought it would be cute to feed a small seagull some of her food. Minutes later a flock of seagulls swarmed and attacked me and my sandwich. FML

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By Anonymous - 11/08/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, I was at the beach with friends and I fell asleep while I was tanning. When I woke up, everyone was laughing hysterically. I asked what was so funny, and one of my friends replies, "you farted so loud in your sleep that you woke yourself up." FML

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By targe - 19/10/2011 09:40 - Australia

Today, after a stressful series of events, I went to the beach to unwind. I sat on the sand, breathed in deeply and closed my eyes, trying to find some sort of inner peace. Then a seagull shat on me. FML

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By joe1234 - 17/07/2009 02:28 - United States

Today, my friend thought it would be funny to put a pretzel on my forehead while I was sleeping on the beach. I now have a pretzel-shaped tan line in the middle of my head. FML

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By beachbirdbait - 09/02/2017 12:00 - United States - Savannah

Today, I drove to the beach for an hour to relax before returning to the intense workload of midterms. A kid walking by threw a cracker near me and I was instantly attacked by a group of seagulls. FML

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By poopedon - 26/04/2009 03:10 - Canada

Today, I was at the beach and fell asleep in the sun. When I woke up, there was a blob of sunscreen on my leg. Thinking it was my boyfriend who was sweet enough to squeeze sunscreen for me, I rubbed it into my leg. After smelling my hands, I discovered it was bird poop. FML

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By FeedTheBirds - 06/09/2017 22:30 - United States - Estero

Today, I bought a delicious $17 lobster sandwich at a restaurant on the beach. The seagull who zoomed in and ripped it out of my hands as I was about to take the first bite seemed to enjoy it very much. FML

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Invaded

By somanybirds - 25/04/2017 08:00 - United States - Jacksonville

Today, while using a doorless restroom at the beach, a pack of seagulls rushed into my stall, followed by a group of kids chasing them. I guess the noise from tearing open a pad sounded enough like a bag of chips for them to think there was food. FML

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By shithead - 18/09/2011 20:17 - United States

Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML

agreeclassic 9 790

vote type 1 51 189

graceinsheepwear 33

Tuesday 15 October 2013 9:11

They pecked your pecker?

j_cat187 19

Tuesday 15 October 2013 10:27

That's sexual harassment. Sue the birds.

Comments

emirie 21

Tuesday 15 October 2013 9:25

Time for some good beach revenge pranks >:)

Ksweety_fml 27

Tuesday 15 October 2013 9:27

Ouch...

graceinsheepwear 33

Tuesday 15 October 2013 9:40

5, even A Flock of Seagulls? Would you run (so far away)?

ihpp 22

Tuesday 15 October 2013 10:16

time for some new friends.

j_cat187 19

Tuesday 15 October 2013 10:27

That's sexual harassment. Sue the birds.

Ziggyboo 10

Tuesday 15 October 2013 23:45

*What most "sue them" comments sound like in FML.

AuricBeast 8

Tuesday 15 October 2013 10:35

Son of a beach

Grauncho 27

Tuesday 15 October 2013 10:56

You spelled "I'm terrible at puns" wrong.

AwkwardPartyBear 24

Tuesday 15 October 2013 12:40

^There's no need to get all sharky.

JMichael 25

Tuesday 15 October 2013 13:28

Yea why not try to have a shell of a good time?

Zaros_fml 24

Tuesday 15 October 2013 18:57

You guys need to sea that this is a real current event. Don't be angry beachause you don't like puns

Beepbeep7 14

Tuesday 15 October 2013 10:37

No more pulling out method for you.

azisles02 17

Tuesday 15 October 2013 11:07

Your friends let you off easy. I would've done one of my favorite movie pranks, write "DORK" on your chest in sunblock & let the rest of you upper body burn.