Miscellaneous: Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When...

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 19:03 - Canada

Today, I drunkenly staggered home and crashed on the couch. When I woke up I realized it wasn't my house. FML

agreeclassic 12 640

vote type 1 34 467

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By Anonymous - 05/07/2019 05:58

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By Anonymous - 18/07/2013 18:16 - Canada - Kelowna

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By Caution - 02/10/2018 22:00

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By Anonymous - 18/05/2009 06:45 - Canada

Today, I was drunk and crashed on my friend's couch to sober up. On the drive home, a cop pulled me over for seemingly no reason. He kept asking if I had been drinking, to which I answered no. Finally, he told me to look in the mirror. My friends had written all over my face while I slept. FML

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By anonymous - 12/02/2011 05:48 - Canada

Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML

agreeclassic 34 838

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CharliesCool2084 8

Thursday 31 May 2012 23:04

How did you get in?

vhivfe 3

Thursday 31 May 2012 23:02

Awkward...

Comments

AzzieC 12

Thursday 31 May 2012 23:47

Owners walk in "ahhhhhhhh!" you "oh um it's ok I was just leaving" grabs stuff get outwhile lady is hitting you with a pillow

esines 9

Friday 1 June 2012 2:17

Ohhhohoho reeeaall goddamn funny

ashley52 5

Friday 1 June 2012 0:00

Well, bad mistakes make funny stories right?

onelove858 5

Friday 1 June 2012 0:06

"damn baby you moved all the furniture"

Sniper3000 0

Friday 1 June 2012 0:16

How did you even get in the house? They don't lock their doors?

olpally 32

Friday 1 June 2012 0:21

Yep... Op woke up to some bacon and eggs :D

johndeere96 0

Friday 1 June 2012 0:29

Thats always a nice suprise :p

twye 22

Friday 1 June 2012 0:35

It's FML posts like this that make me afraid to drink.

error_031 0

Friday 1 June 2012 0:40

O RLY?

sambudd14 2

Friday 1 June 2012 0:47

Wish I was that fun when I'm drunk :)

Dawnxxoo 11

Friday 1 June 2012 0:58

lol this fml rhymes

c8750 2

Friday 1 June 2012 1:31

Um, ok...no it doesn't

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Don't take it away!

agreeclassic 252

vote type 1 56

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agreeclassic 31 901

vote type 1 4 550

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agreeclassic 26 086

vote type 1 7 974

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, meeting his family for the first time. We were all standing in the kitchen when suddenly a small white and brown mouse ran by. Out of natural instinct, I stomped on it. Turns out, it was his little sister's pet mouse that had gotten out of its cage earlier. FML

agreeclassic 20 014

vote type 1 52 265

Today, it's been a week since my family moved from a city to a house we inherited out in the middle of nowhere. It's horrible! There's wild animals everywhere, my dad says I have to help take care of the house now, it's a thirty minute ride to school, there's no sidewalks, and I hate it here! I want to go back! FML

agreeclassic 346

vote type 1 625

Today, I was cleaning my car when I hit the automatic window button while I was vacuuming in between the door and the driver's seat, and got stuck halfway out, in full view of my neighbor. He had to come get me out, because I couldn't reach the button. FML

agreeclassic 495

vote type 1 238