Miscellaneous: Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how...

By MarBlu - 23/01/2014 12:53 - United States

Today, I came home from the army and explained to my family how tough it was there. Then, as I was walking away, I stubbed my toe on the couch, fell and cried. FML

agreeclassic 47 641

vote type 1 16 460

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By Unlucky - 09/10/2009 19:52 - United States

Today, as I got up from the couch, my computer, which was next to me, fell on to my pinky toe. It fell just so that the edge of it cut my toe open. I cursed, and hobbled toward the bathroom to get a bandage. As I'm going into the bathroom, I stub said toe on the door jamb. FML

agreeclassic 38 676

vote type 1 4 958

Dude! Come on!

By CreeperKiller2000 - 29/05/2017 00:00

Today, I woke up really out of it, and as I was walking into the kitchen, I stubbed my toe on a tile. I sat down, then got up and stubbed the same toe against the table, went over to the kitchen and stubbed the same toe on the same tile again. FML

agreeclassic 4 085

vote type 1 1 228

Agony

By ... - 02/10/2012 20:55 - Canada - Airdrie

Today, I fell down the stairs and landed heavily on my foot. Because I wasn't crying, my mom refused to take me to the hospital. It took me an hour of agony to convince her. It turned out to be broken in three different places. FML

agreeclassic 30 388

vote type 1 1 792

Put some steel toe boots on

By TheMadKian - 17/09/2023 10:00

Today, I went to shut the door and ended up banging my toe on my guitar stand; then, as I was getting a snack out of a closet, I banged my toe again on the drawer and now I can't walk. FML

agreeclassic 449

vote type 1 274

Totally worth it

By Sarah - 10/12/2025 12:00

Today, I tried to sneak into the kitchen for a midnight snack. I stubbed my toe so hard on a stool leg, I yelped then tried to keep as quiet as possible. My mom came running, thinking our cat and dog were fighting and hissing again. I hobbled back to bed, only to realize I didn't actually get any food. FML

agreeclassic 102

vote type 1 262

By HotCurry - 05/09/2009 04:57 - United States

Today, my girlfriend, her grandma, and I were leaving her house to eat lunch. I stubbed my toe on the door while exiting. It hurt, so I stood there shortly in pain. I heard my girlfriend's grandma call me a "pansy". I later saw blood and took off my shoe. My whole toenail had come off of my big toe. FML

agreeclassic 50 184

vote type 1 3 537

By erianne - 07/05/2018 15:00

Today, the neighbors heard a blood curdling scream and called the cops, thinking I was being murdered. Nope. I just stubbed my toe. FML

agreeclassic 2 892

vote type 1 616

Dumb, but relatable

By Maju - 31/10/2019 04:00 - Netherlands

Today, I hit my toe against a table. Out of frustration, I kicked the table and broke my little toe. FML

agreeclassic 553

vote type 1 2 756

By ow - 13/06/2011 05:39 - United States

Today, I was home alone in my apartment. I tripped over my dresser and fell and sprained my ankle. As I was laying there in agonizing pain, my downstairs neighbor shouted at me to shut up. FML

agreeclassic 32 025

vote type 1 4 776

Life is pain

By pussy - 21/04/2022 04:00 - United States

Today, since my family and friends always make fun of me for being a wuss when it comes to pain, when I stubbed my toe, I made a point to not scream or complain in any way. Instead, I vomited and fainted. FML

agreeclassic 863

vote type 1 252

FML_Elle 17

Thursday 23 January 2014 17:07

Stubbing your toe can really hurt! And thank you for your service

That_Ginger 18

Thursday 23 January 2014 17:08

Just be thankful you didn't step on a lego block. Many a good men have lost their lives to those foul pieces of plastic.

Comments

HammyBear13 8

Friday 24 January 2014 15:09

Hes a soldier, not a Marine. Hes allowed to cry over a stubbed toe. The Army is the gentler side of the military. Go ahead and cry OP.

dumpless 13

Saturday 25 January 2014 5:03

Welcome home

PYROxSYCO3 7

Sunday 26 January 2014 6:42

I hate that, you can take a gut shot from a paint round but littlest shit can **** you over big time

music87 14

Sunday 26 January 2014 7:56

Hey, it hurts to stub your toe! Toes were made for balance, not strength. I stubbed mine really bad the other day. It STILL hurts.

beddyby12 4

Thursday 30 January 2014 3:59

Thank you for your service and I hope that toe feels better! It really does hurt!

joeland87 3

Sunday 16 February 2014 7:30

Ouch.

ct5555 15

Sunday 6 July 2014 0:10

I get it the army are ******* and the marines are tough sons of bitches

i_lik_tomaters 21

Tuesday 21 April 2015 7:13

Stubbing your toe hurts. I've broken multiple toes doing that

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Today, I opened some junk mail addressed to my fiancé and saw a credit letter about applying for a new mortgage. When I called to tell him his identity was stolen, he admitted he bought a house, and then broke up with me. I had no clue he was unhappy. FML.

agreeclassic 585

vote type 1 148

Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML

agreeclassic 48 053

vote type 1 6 292

Today, my boyfriend told me about this guy who makes balloon animals with his penis. My boyfriend has spent the last 4 hours trying to make his penis look like a pretzel. FML

agreeclassic 33 745

vote type 1 4 483

Today, we had a surprise test at school. I was totally unprepared for any of it, so I BSd the whole thing and turned it in. A few minutes later, our teacher said we were allowed to use our notes to finish the test. FML

agreeclassic 19 687

vote type 1 5 961

Today, at a customer's house, I was asked to carry her delivery of six pieces of heavy furniture up to her office. Normally, not a problem, but this insane woman had Witches' Stairs (Google them), which were was an accident begging to happen. She told my boss I was unhelpful, uncooperative, and rude. FML

agreeclassic 433

vote type 1 95

Today, I used the tanning booth for the first time. Not only was I so white that I received first-degree burns all over my body, but I also forgot to remove my knee-high socks. FML

agreeclassic 8 678

vote type 1 47 205