Intimacy and Miscellaneous: Today, I attempted to score with a previous friend-with-benefits...

By Anonymous - 28/12/2016 01:28

Today, I attempted to score with a previous friend-with-benefits by sending her a photo of my Christmas present, bondage rope. She arrived an hour later in a mad panic. She thought I was going to hang myself. FML

agreeclassic 8 990

vote type 1 3 128

When Christmas Ends Badly…
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By Anonymous - 24/08/2014 05:51 - United States - Hicksville

Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML

agreeclassic 44 966

vote type 1 7 038

By Anonymous - 02/10/2009 08:37 - Australia

Today, I sent my long-distance girlfriend the first photo of me I'd sent her in a while. It was a photo of me with some of my friends. She didn't know which one I was. FML

agreeclassic 36 386

vote type 1 11 575

By Paco4242 - 13/06/2009 01:47 - United States

Today, I found out that my 'girlfriend', who I've been emailing with, was really my friend playing a prank on me. He asked me for naked pictures of myself and I sent them to him. FML

agreeclassic 24 914

vote type 1 78 262

By ALetterADay - 24/12/2017 01:30

Today, I wrote a long, loving and emotional Christmas letter to my girlfriend, leaving it for her to read when she woke up. Halfway through the day, I received a text stating that she saw my "breakup letter" and threw out all my stuff. I can't even contact her now. FML

agreeclassic 5 119

vote type 1 476

By smart phone mms - 07/12/2009 06:36 - United States

Today, I got a new smartphone and wanted to surprise my girlfriend with a naughty picture with it. A few minutes after sending it, I got a reply back from my girlfriend. And my best friend. And my sister. And everyone on my contacts list. FML

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By calliefml - 26/04/2009 06:13 - United States

Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate hanging a voodoo doll of me on a noose. FML

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Sherri Papini has a lot to answer for

By FtHisSHet - 27/01/2023 17:30

Today, my wife faked being kidnapped. She composed a ransom letter and made calls from her phone screaming for help frantically and hanging up. I got the cops involved. Turns out it was all a scam, because she “wanted to see what I’d do” because apparently she “hasn’t been feeling loved” lately. FML

agreeclassic 1 408

vote type 1 188

You might as well know…

By Anonymous - 02/08/2022 06:00

Today, I was sending screenshots to my best friend about a guy who'd screwed me over. I sent the screenshots to him instead. FML

agreeclassic 249

vote type 1 947

By anonymous - 22/11/2009 20:23 - United States

Today, I got a text from a woman containing many naked pictures of her. Apparently she meant to send those to her boyfriend whose number is one digit from mine. The bad part? My girlfriend was using my phone when I received that message. FML

agreeclassic 48 702

vote type 1 2 995

Surprised?

By neverbeensurprised - 14/08/2009 05:29 - United States

Today, I found out my friend has been texting my long distance boyfriend more than I do. When I confronted her about it, she confessed that it was because they had been planning a surprise appearance for me. I've never been surprised before, and I ruined my own surprise. FML

agreeclassic 19 200

vote type 1 47 294

corky1992 33

Tuesday 3 January 2017 6:48

At least she still cares enough to try and stop you

Laphog 17

Monday 2 January 2017 14:08

Would love to know who originally gifted you that .

Comments

corky1992 33

Tuesday 3 January 2017 6:48

At least she still cares enough to try and stop you

Tenbed 10

Wednesday 11 January 2017 1:12

<p>You deserved that for not thinking it through, but at least you know she cares.</p>

infernap000 7

Tuesday 7 February 2017 5:10

did you... Get the girl in the end?

GDGRDHER 5

Thursday 29 June 2017 22:52

at least she cares

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, my wife was lucky not to get fired from her part-time job for doing nothing since we went into lockdown 8 weeks ago. To celebrate this, she has downed two bottles of red wine and watched an entire season of Virgin River. Guess I’ll have to find a third job to make up the income when the inevitable happens. FML

agreeclassic 898

vote type 1 119

Today, I finally got a job so I could stop missing out on going out with my friends every weekend. Turns out I work only Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, and there's no way around it. FML

agreeclassic 23 473

vote type 1 4 865

Today, I took my new boyfriend to my step-sister's wedding. He knew more people there than I did, including 3 bridesmaids he used to sleep with. FML

agreeclassic 4 927

vote type 1 508

Today, I got a lecture from my mother about how bad my stress has been, how I have to treat myself better and do something with my life. She still doesn't realize that most of the cause of my stress has been from her berating me about how stressed out I am. FML

agreeclassic 940

vote type 1 115

Today, I was at a professional tennis match. The ball was hit extremely hard, resulting in it going into the crowd. And when I say crowd, I mean my face. FML

agreeclassic 24 350

vote type 1 2 143

Today, I was singing in the shower, not realising the window was open. When I got out, the neighbours were at the front door, loudly arguing with my mother. They were complaining about my awful singing. FML

agreeclassic 41 966

vote type 1 7 039

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Sherri Papini has a lot to answer for

You might as well know…

Surprised?

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