Kids Sorry sweetie

Sorry sweetie

ddhaley1 - - United States - Edmond

Today, instead of kissing my child's boo-boo on her finger to make it feel better, I accidentally headbutted her. FML

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Chinese New Year: Dragons and Laughter
Celebrate with stories where tradition and humor meet for a colorful Chinese New Year. …

jazz - 22/01/2010 08:11 - France

Today, I was holding hands with my daughter and she wanted to skip. When I went to skip I accidentally kneed her in the face. Everyone saw her holding her busted lip and pointing at me. FML

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Oily - 16/12/2011 09:08 - New Zealand

Today, my 7-year-old daughter came up to me in a noisy mall and said "boo-boo" pointing to her hand. Not paying enough attention, I kissed her hand to make her feel better. She grimaced and said "No dad, bird poo." FML

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Great parenting

clutzymama - 10/07/2015 04:27 - Canada - Woodbridge

Today, my 4-year-old daughter slipped on ceramic tile and I had to take her to the ER for 5 stitches to her chin. When we got home, I promptly split her chin open again as I over enthusiastically re-enacted how she fell to my husband and accidentally clocked her square in the chin. FML

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RomanceFail - 02/04/2015 12:51 - United States - Crestwood

Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML

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gbabyy - 22/11/2009 03:25 - United States

Today, my daughter was playing outside. I was watching her from the window, and I saw her pick up a dead bird. I ran outside to grab her. As I picked her up and started scolding her, she tried to scratch my face. In the attempt, her hand went straight into my mouth. FML

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Could go either way, tbh

Anonymous - 14/09/2024 12:00 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, while on a first date, I leaned in to kiss her, but my lips somehow brushed against her nose instead. I panicked and ended up kissing her forehead like a grandma saying goodbye to a child. FML

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Sorry Sharon

Anonymous - 25/02/2023 16:00

Today, I tried to high-five someone but somehow ended up slapping them in the face. FML

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Stan - 29/08/2011 21:19 - United States

Today, I was doing my jazz aerobics workout and accidentally kicked my 3 year old daughter in the face. Everyone we know, including my wife, thinks I beat her. FML

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MommyProblems - 19/01/2014 05:17 - United States

Today, my 2-year-old son put his hand on my face, gave me a sweet kiss, and put his cheek against mine. Then he slapped me hard enough to leave a mark, laughed, and scrambled away. FML

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badmom101 - 16/05/2009 11:26 - Canada

Today, my 5 year old daughter thought it would be funny to wake me up by tickling my toes. I guess one of my reflexes acted out because I kicked her right in the face. FML

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ShortieRose 30

Sunday 19 July 2015 17:08

I've heard of inflicting new pain to make the old pain diminish... but that's a little much! ;)

limegreenpoopie 31

Sunday 19 July 2015 17:08

Kiss her head too :)

gobiteme2 34

Sunday 19 July 2015 17:30

Putting a child into a coma for a boo-boo seems a little extreme to me.

be82tw 17

Sunday 19 July 2015 17:50

OP: putting the "Tough" into "Tough Love" since 2015.

tarlax 11

Sunday 19 July 2015 19:28

be82tw: putting the "ugh" into comments since that pun.

fakedsincerity 32

Sunday 19 July 2015 17:52

I've done this too to a kid I was babysitting. Clumsy people, unite. lol.

ayyy_bro 26

Sunday 19 July 2015 18:16

You have to learn to laugh at these things, no biggie. ?

alexanderavatar 24

Sunday 19 July 2015 19:19

child care 101

WOTAN1488 24

Sunday 19 July 2015 19:20

"RAWR! THIS WILL MAKE IT BETTER, CHILD!!" *proceeds to ram child*

ladyg228 15

Sunday 19 July 2015 19:30

Wow parent fail +1000 points lol

ezrajab 22

Sunday 19 July 2015 19:44

Ohh boy

darkenedone 27

Sunday 19 July 2015 19:44

Now you have 2 boo-boos to kiss.

Haze115 14

Sunday 19 July 2015 19:48

hardcore, man...

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Today, my French wife chose the name of our unborn baby girl. She wants to call her Fanny and won't change her mind. FML

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Today, I found out why my husband faked being sick on Thanksgiving. He was invited to Thanksgiving dinner by to the coworker he’s seeing. She was planning to introduce him to her family. He never told her he was married, so knowing I would tag along if he came, he faked having a “fever” so he couldn’t go out. FML

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Today, I got a slap because my 8 year-old stepson has such a big mouth, he couldn’t resist pointing out a nearby white woman had a "phat butt" and should "give it back to the black lady she stole it from." I blame his racist old grandad for this. FML

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Today, I was chilling in my comfy zip-up sweatshirt when I realized I was running late for an acting class. In my mad panic, I forgot I didn't have a shirt or bra underneath. Later in class, I was performing a scene and started to unzip my sweatshirt. You can figure out the rest. FML

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Today, I filed a client's tax return. His refunds alone were more than my gross annual salary. FML

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Today, my five year old son decided to move all my stuffed animals I have around the house, into sex positions and massive orgies. What have I been teaching my son lately? FML

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