Kids: How in hell…? - FML

How in hell…?

By Anonymous - 19/06/2013 16:12 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, my 16-year-old son broke two of his fingers playing with Play-Doh. FML

agreeclassic 52 038

vote type 1 5 283

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Teenagers…

By why the fuck would you do that - 25/02/2013 02:57 - United States - Phoenix

Today, my son broke his hand when he and his best friend had the genius idea of punching each other in the fists as hard as they could. FML

agreeclassic 32 622

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Learning curve

By Anonymous - 16/08/2017 16:00

Today, my 3-year-old son put into practice the lesson I taught him yesterday, about how to use a larger piece of Play-Doh to pick up smaller bits. Unfortunately, he used this method to pick up a small bit of poo from his pants with a larger bit of poo direct from the toilet. I was an hour late for work. FML

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Not too fond of the chair

By Anonymous - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my son threw the biggest fit in history about going to the dentist. He broke a whole stack of plates, overflowed the bathtub, let the dog loose, and kicked his father when he tried to calm him down. My son is 17. FML

agreeclassic 34 877

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Great work, son

By firestar772 - 12/06/2013 06:21 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, I went to pick up my 6-year-old son from his friend's house. They were having a great time, and he didn't want to leave. So, while I wasn't looking, he superglued both his hands to their kitchen table. FML

agreeclassic 54 838

vote type 1 5 474

By Anonymous - 28/06/2013 20:36 - Jordan - Amman

Today, my 12-year-old son played QWOP on my laptop. Half an hour later, he virtually destroyed it in a fit of rage. FML

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Kids will be kids

By Anonymous - 27/08/2020 10:02 - Australia - Murarrie

Today, my son accidentally damaged another kid in the face with a baseball bat, while blindfolded trying to hit a piñata. Except there was no piñata, or blindfold. FML

agreeclassic 692

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By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid who discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

agreeclassic 36 264

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Cats are the same

By GrumpyMonk - 21/01/2022 04:58

Today, my son was playing with a piece of plastic wrapping and trying not to let it fall to the floor as if it were a balloon. This is after he got some kick ass gifts for Christmas. Kids. FML

agreeclassic 450

vote type 1 790

So, here's the thing…

By dad - 28/04/2024 11:00 - United States

Today, my 6 year-old son and his cousin were play boxing. For fun, I taught them some real moves. I guess my son is a natural but my nephew got hit so hard he fell over and broke his arm. Now I have to explain this to my wife and her sister. FML

agreeclassic 148

vote type 1 670

Back in fashion (Oppenheimer dolls not so much)

By JGarz - 10/10/2015 07:21 - United States - Tucson

Today, I walked in on my teenage son passionately making out with one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML

agreeclassic 25 322

vote type 1 2 733

Next

TOP COMMENTS

TheDrifter 23

Wednesday 19 June 2013 22:30

True talent. Hide the modeling clay, it might put him in the ICU.

KainMoogle 21

Wednesday 19 June 2013 22:32

All I want to know is one thing... How?

Comments

Abi123 1

Sunday 23 June 2013 0:46

Hey, don't make fun of him, that's some pretty dangerous stuff!

Rapunzel1974 23

Sunday 23 June 2013 6:43

So, scissors are clearly going to be out of the question for this kiddo.

Spottedfeather 7

Monday 24 June 2013 2:14

No offense intended, and I normally try to be respectful, but your son is a moron. How the hell do you break your finger on something that's not solid ?

plagiarismo 16

Monday 24 June 2013 18:53

Good lord.

Link5794 18

Friday 28 June 2013 12:42

kuma32792 2

Wednesday 7 August 2013 7:36

Instructions not clear enough, penis caught in ceiling fan.

electric_rider20 4

Friday 30 August 2013 23:23

I can honestly say that I have my history of violent play-doh. I'm a 15 year old girl....

LLSpanky 24

Tuesday 31 December 2013 14:14

You could tell us how it can happen then!

justindrew14 29

Monday 14 October 2013 16:18

How does that...wait what???

AlexCanada77 13

Thursday 1 May 2014 20:35

How?

Simbaby 23

Friday 1 August 2014 6:00

One thing.... How ???

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Today, I went to a restaurant for lunch. The waiter brought some bread and I started eating it as I waited for him to take my order. When he approached me he looked at me and said, "Don't eat too much bread honey. It'll make you fatter." Not fat, fatter. I never thought of myself as fat. FML

agreeclassic 47 293

vote type 1 7 076

Today, I decided I'd take a nap in my car because I got to work very early. As I was waking up from my nap, I saw a cop looking right at me. Turns out, a lady who'd parked her car right next to mine after I was asleep had called the cops on me because she thought I was dead. FML

agreeclassic 32 657

vote type 1 4 367

Today, a third person in my husband's family made a comment insinuating that our children aren't my husband's. I have never cheated on him, they are 100% his, and look just like him. I'm not sure if they are joking and rude, or serious and stupid. FML

agreeclassic 1 171

vote type 1 122

Today, I finished birthday shopping for my husband, my son, and a close friend, who all have birthdays within a week. I was proud of myself for being organized, until I remembered: my husband has a twin sister. FML

agreeclassic 825

vote type 1 187

Today, I told my toddler to put the cat down, so he did. On my leg. I guess I should have been more specific. FML

agreeclassic 1 391

vote type 1 291

Today, after taking a massive shit, I flushed the toilet and it clogged. It flooded to the brim and the shit came rising to the top. I didn't know what to do so I grabbed some toilet paper and picked it up, ran to my balcony, and launched it. It landed on my neighbor's car. FML

agreeclassic 1 273

vote type 1 3 747