unlucky_duck666

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Unlucky_duck666's favorite FMLs

By now afraid... - 03/04/2016 17:28 - United States - Bloomington

Today, I found a bowl of green beans just sitting in my microwave. The only person in my life who ever eats green beans is my psycho ex-girlfriend. She moved out three months ago. FML

agreeclassic 740

vote type 1 83

By cactusfears - 02/04/2016 19:48 - United States - Olathe

Today, my father stumbled upon the quickest way to get me out of bed in the morning: ripping out my nose stud. FML

agreeclassic 21 407

vote type 1 3 440

cactusfears app_comment_confession_title

cactusfears 2

Sunday 3 April 2016 18:50

Hey idk how to work this but OP here. I should probably clarify, it was an accident - my dad was joking around rubbing one of my stuffed toys on my face to annoy me out of bed when the stud got caught on some of the stitching and got yanked out. Thankfully part of it was still in the piercing - it was just hanging there by the short part of the L-hook - so I didn't lose it, and my mom managed to get it back in, and it didn't hurt too bad. Just thought it was kinda funny :)

By fuckyoudeadgunnuts - 04/09/2015 14:30 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I met my Canadian friend at the airport. As we were heading into the city, I told him not to worry about all the US stereotypes and that gun crime in my city is rare. A few hours later, we witnessed a guy get shot in the street in broad daylight. Now he's too scared to leave the house. FML

agreeclassic 26 785

vote type 1 2 844

By thatsnotacat - 21/11/2013 17:52 - Australia - West End

Today, I woke up to something tickling me. Thinking it was my cat, I reached under the covers to give her a friendly scratch behind the ears. I imagine the giant spider that was actually there enjoyed my terrified screams. FML

agreeclassic 48 545

vote type 1 3 364

By luvonsarah - 14/08/2012 17:27 - United States - Beaverton

Today, I was out drinking with some friends in a Safeway parking lot, when I saw a familiar-looking vehicle pull up beside us. It was my dad, who angrily got out and demanded that I come home. I'm twenty-four, and now the laughing stock of my social circle. FML

agreeclassic 15 554

vote type 1 24 981

luvonsarah app_comment_confession_title

luvonsarah 8

Wednesday 15 August 2012 2:49

Hey there! I am the OP. A few things I'd like to address: I was only visiting my parents. I do have my own place. I stayed out a little later than I thought I would and they got worried. The bar (in which we were drinking) is in the same parking lot as Safeway. We stepped out to grab some vitamin water and smoke a cigarette.