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Wax_soup's favorite FMLs

By j4y - 29/01/2009 00:30 - Canada

Today, I went to the gym to try to get into shape. I pulled a muscle taking my sweater off in the locker room. FML

agreeclassic 31 110

vote type 1 6 653

Zinger!

By Familyskank - 06/05/2009 16:57 - United States

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

agreeclassic 108 677

vote type 1 24 953

You what now?

By tryena - 28/02/2009 10:59 - United States

Today, I babysat a five year-old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML

agreeclassic 20 315

vote type 1 93 026

No filter

By Judiee - 28/02/2009 10:52 - United States

Today, I was introduced to my boyfriend's family at a family reunion for the first time. As I sat on the couch, his 4 year-old sister comes in and jumps onto my lap. For a moment I was happy to think his sister liked me, only to hear her say, "You're fat! I like fat things." FML

agreeclassic 56 911

vote type 1 5 781

Lost

By wideman - this FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was at church and saw a blind teenager who obviously looked lost. Feeling like I should help, I went over and asked if he needed anything. He said, "I can't find my caretaker." I asked, "What does she look like?" FML

agreeclassic 18 789

vote type 1 66 052