MrJesus_fml

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Miami, Florida, USA
35 years-old
Friday 22 June 1990
single

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Mrjesus_fml's favorite FMLs

By kawood - 30/03/2012 11:32 - United States

Today, I had to sit in the hospital with my 88-year-old grandfather by myself. During the five hours I was there, he insisted on sharing the intimate details of his many sexcapades that he has had since World War II. FML

agreeclassic 27 559

vote type 1 3 126

By Anonymous - 29/03/2012 16:53 - United States - Houston

Today, I thought about how my dad went to get me a Halloween costume and hasn't come home yet. That was 11 years ago. We've moved twice since then. FML

agreeclassic 45 745

vote type 1 2 953

By Anonymous - 26/03/2012 01:10 - United States

Today, I woke up in jail charged with a DWI. I wasn't drinking last night and the only thing I remember is taking my prescription sleep medicine and lying down. FML

agreeclassic 32 387

vote type 1 2 588

By Tourist - 26/03/2009 07:19 - United States

Today, while at the Golden Gate Bridge, I spotted a large group of Asians trying to take a picture. Trying to help, I slowly say, "You... want me... take picture?" while using hand motions. The man looks at me and says, "No thanks asshole, I got it," in plain English. FML

agreeclassic 206

vote type 1 1 164