xparkourx

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london, Canada
37 years-old
Tuesday 06 September 1988
couple

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Xparkourx's favorite FMLs

By Anonymous - 06/12/2011 00:11 - United States

Today, after having spent days working on it, I finished off a really elaborate seasonal greetings card for my boss. When I gave it to him, he took one look at it, flicked it in his trash can and said, "Fuck off, Steve." So much for a Christmas bonus. FML

agreeclassic 23 557

vote type 1 19 088

By Anonymous - 04/12/2011 13:01 - United States

Today, while I was watching TV, my boyfriend took my unicorn pillow pet and made it hump my arm. I told him to stop acting like a child. He replied, "Children don't have sex like this," and started making sex noises while making the pillow pet hump my arm faster and harder. FML

agreeclassic 34 161

vote type 1 11 231

Stolen valor

By lifesucksbigtimefuys - this FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, the girl I've had a crush on for years asked if I could be her "emergency gay friend." The worst part? I said yes. FML

agreeclassic 29 939

vote type 1 27 169

By PicturePerfect - 02/03/2009 21:33 - Canada

Today, I was walking when a man pointed a camera at me. I got bitchy about it, and said "Did I say you could take a picture?" He replied with, "No, but can you get the fuck out of the way so I can take one of my wife and kids?" I turned around, and they were right behind me. FML

agreeclassic 167

vote type 1 1 026