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By done - 09/08/2017 19:30 - United States - Mercer Island

Today, I started to fill out a job application online, with age being one of the first things I put in. After half an hour and 40 questions, I hit submit. I was then told that I wasn't old enough to apply. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 235

You deserved it 411

By "indienerdgirl" - 20/09/2017 09:35

Today, after years of pain and swelling in my foot from what I thought was chronic ankle sprains, I found out I have a broken bone in my foot. I have no clue how long it's been broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 507

You deserved it 887

indienerdgirl tells us more.

indienerdgirl 27

Sunday 17 September 2017 4:04

Hey all OP here. I'm surprised this got published. But yes I did go to doctors and I got Xrays. Long story short is after the first sprain it became a problem during the winter months. My husband jokes that I like to kiss the sidewalk. I went to 2 doctors who just thought they were sprains and took xrays and saw nothing. One sent me to doctor #3 who thought my tendons were over stretched and sent me to a surgeon to see if I was able to have tendon tighting surgery. The surgeon, who was a royal ass, sent me to physical therapy only for me to come out in more pain. Saw 3rd doctor again and he sent me to another surgeon as he still thought I needed surgery and that physical therapy was a waste of time. I had Xrays at almost every appointment mind you. The 2nd surgeon not only did Xrays but did an MRI too and found 2 small breaks in one of the smallest bones in my foot. The best we can figure is that even after each sprain healed the next sprain rebroke the bone which is why I had constant pain. So now I'm in a cast and stay off of it as much as possible like before. Also to make this story even more difficult my son was born last July and I have a bunch of other chronic illnesses I had been dealing with that at one point I had to put a hold on getting my foot fixed. But thankfully it's getting better now that I know what happen lol

By RectalSteve - 10/09/2017 20:00 - United Kingdom - Belfast

Today, I showed my girlfriend some old home videos of me as a kid. My dad must have taped over one though, because halfway through it cut to extremely graphic footage of his colonoscopy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 582

You deserved it 288

By crushed dreams - 16/06/2011 06:20 - United States

Today, I went from a party where both of my girlfriends decided to show, to a hospital bed with no girlfriends and a painful left testicle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 541

You deserved it 244 201

Alexa, play "Let Down" by Radiohead

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Central Islip

Today, the guy I've been crushing on at work finally asked me out to lunch. I was nervous we wouldn't have anything to talk about. He spent the entire hour talking about how amazing his new girlfriend is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 799

You deserved it 1 402

By benjamin03 - 26/07/2016 00:32

Today, I learned that lightning and flash flooding are the best motivatiors. I learned this while on a run and 2 miles away from school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 666

You deserved it 1 468

benjamin03_fml tells us more.

benjamin03_fml 22

Tuesday 26 July 2016 14:55

Op here! To clarify, I was a cross country practice which meets at the school. We run from there and end there at the weight room. I did end up getting soaked, mostly because we got stuck at a red light. Thanks for the comments!

By decenthumanbeing - 14/07/2016 13:13

Today, I entered a restaurant just to use the WiFi. In order not to look cheap, I ordered a meal and a beverage. The WiFi didn't work and now I don't have enough money to buy dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 962

You deserved it 12 793

Chillin'

By lacy - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Louisville

Today, I told my husband to give our dog a bath while I was at work. When I returned home, I found my dog, along with my husband, in the bath together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 767

You deserved it 10 667

Probably for the best

By TooInnocent - 07/07/2016 17:44 - United Kingdom - Sheffield

Today, I was told that I was no longer being considered for the Prison Officer job I have been interviewed for, because a social media check showed I had liked a picture of drugs, so my character is inappropriate. I thought it was a picture of candy. I've never even tried weed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 003

You deserved it 2 247

By disappointed - 01/07/2016 03:31 - United States - Rockville

Today, my eldest daughter told me about the sharp pains she's been having for the past couple of days. She also told me how she thinks it's really pointy carrots trying to escape her body. She's 11, and going to middle school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 056

You deserved it 1 490

By Anonymous - 09/03/2018 15:00 - Denmark

Today, I got a letter from the police, stating that I must either pay a fine or go to court. Turns out my creepy stalker stole not only my underwear, jewelry, and pictures, but also my mail, including a ticket I had gotten for reporting my new address too late. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 464

You deserved it 248

By Bummed - 12/06/2016 19:44

Today, I found out that after interviewing for two jobs at great companies, I was neck and neck with one other person for each position. They both offered the job to the other person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 981

You deserved it 992

By TCRII - 28/03/2018 01:30

Today, my wife said she wants a divorce. Three days ago, I added her onto the title to my house, my bank accounts, and my business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 053

You deserved it 775

By yamblam5 - 29/05/2016 03:32 - United States - Monroe

Today, it's been months since I graduated university. I still haven't managed to land a single interview. Meanwhile my brother recently woke up from a week long bender, realized he had no money for weed, went out, and 4 days later landed a well paid sales job 15 minutes from home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 836

You deserved it 1 517

By Anonymous - 14/05/2016 10:34 - United States - Lubbock

Today, I found an injured rabbit by the side of the road. I was about to take it to the local vet, when my husband picked it up and casually snapped its neck. "No rabbit's worth my money" he said, forgetting that he's been a jobless moocher for over 3 years. Pass me the goddamn divorce papers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 971

You deserved it 2 647

People suck

By why - 02/05/2016 20:08 - United States - Beachwood

Today, the family I was serving had ordered calamari and when I brought out the food, they started yelling at me because apparently their daughter was allergic to it. Just why would you order it then? FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 060

You deserved it 900

By nancie - 02/08/2018 20:30

Today, while I was at work, my husband threw out 50 out of my 70 T-shirts, all of my tank tops, and all but one of my sweaters. I'm not getting them back because they're burning in a bonfire in the backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 884

You deserved it 720

Pest control

By sigh - 13/04/2016 02:10 - United States - Charlotte

Today, my new neighbor offered to "humanely capture and relocate" the squirrels in my attic. He then "humanely" shot at them with a BB gun, and the "relocated" them into his stomach once they were killed. Welcome to the neighborhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 822

You deserved it 2 539

Pissed

By Sally - 24/08/2018 22:00

Today, after cleaning my house, I decided to treat myself with a glass of wine. I poured the wine, set it down, and came back just in time to see my cat push it off the table. I then yelled at her, which scared her so much she pissed on the carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 638

You deserved it 876

By Anonymous - 30/08/2018 23:30

Today, I got home from work, took a shower, got ready for bed, and laid down right in cat piss. Now I'm shampooing the mattress and taking another shower just to sleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 915

You deserved it 425

By anonymous - 25/03/2016 22:19 - United States - Manchester

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex for the first time, the one day my period came early. He thought it was a sign from God and thinks we're going to hell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 824

You deserved it 3 224

By Well then - 10/09/2018 03:30

Today, I discovered that my fiancé and I had vastly different definitions of monogamy. Don't worry, he only did it when he was mad at me to remind him how much he loved me. I found out from my best friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 326

You deserved it 238

By pancaketits - 22/03/2016 15:33 - United States - Havertown

Today, a classmate accused me of having butt implants because "women can't have a huge ass and pancake tits". FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 384

You deserved it 1 665

Fragile

By Humaned - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Curaçao - Willemstad

Today, my school is making us take care of eggs for a teen pregnancy awareness project. Ever since we got the eggs, I've had nightmares… and people wonder why I don't want kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 681

You deserved it 1 845

Pros and cons

By GrandTheftArson - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Canada - Waterloo

Today, my ex stole my car keys. Good news is she can't drive stick. Bad news is she set my car on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 576

You deserved it 1 638

Wardrobe change please

By Meagan Ortiz - 16/08/2020 23:02

Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 562

You deserved it 270

Roleplay

By Anonymous - 16/10/2012 12:36 - United States - Battle Creek

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 124

You deserved it 20 598

By Jif_Creamy - 28/02/2016 05:00 - United States - Washington

Today, at my college, someone snatched my laptop out of my hands, so I chased him. Turns out I'm so overweight and slow that he moonwalked away facing me, while I sprinted my heart out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 917

You deserved it 7 184

That's that, then

By Anonymous - 12/09/2020 08:02

Today, I walked in on my brother having sex. With my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 658

You deserved it 220

By That_Teenager_ - 18/02/2016 02:01 - United States - Hampshire

Today, I took a bus to the city. When I sat down, my hand accidentally slapped again the knee of the guy sitting next to me. I apologized. He responded, "It's just a knee," and started stroking mine. This lasted the entire ride. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 146

You deserved it 2 441

That_Teenager_ tells us more.

That_Teenager_ 13

Thursday 18 February 2016 22:48

Hey guys!! Op here! I honestly didn't expect this to get accepted. Anyway, I wanna say thanks to all the people making jokes, I found them hilarious. To the people wondering, yes I'm female. Also, the bus was PACKED, or else I definitely would've moved. Trust me, I glared at him as much as I could and I actually told him to stop multiple times. I even threatened him with calling the police, but he wouldn't stop. But you know, I got to my stop and had a wonderful day in the city even after that experience. Nothing else happened, and I'm back home safe and sound. Sorry for the long explanation!