By 19collegestudentandpregant - 26/09/2014 22:07 - United States - Loretto
The Top
Jack…
By Alliente - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States
By fmmmmlll - 12/06/2012 05:29 - United States
By GothicAngel17 - 19/05/2012 11:05 - Australia - Brisbane
GothicAngel17 tells us more.
Get where you can!
By Anonymous - 10/06/2014 02:14 - United States - Richmond
By ItsFunnyNow - 22/10/2009 04:07 - United States
By Anonymous - 10/10/2009 21:53 - United States
By FlipYoC - 16/09/2009 06:15 - United States
Seething jealousy
By Anonymous - 07/06/2016 01:04
Hiya!
By Anonymous - 25/08/2009 11:40 - United Kingdom
By TheLadyOpal - 13/12/2013 07:55 - United States
TheLadyOpal tells us more.
Aaaah! I finally got an FML published :D Awesome. Now to clear a few things up: I have had an irrational fear of sudden loud noises my whole life. Not necessarily the noise itself - (although there are exceptions if it's particularly loud, like the smoke alarm), but the anticipation of the noise - one of the reasons I hated school was because I would sit in class and worry about whether or not we'd be having a fire drill that day. And I don't keep an alarm clock. I have tried to keep one in the past, only to realize that if I'm expecting an alarm to wake me up in the morning, I don't sleep. I don't have a cell phone either, and I live alone, so to the smartass who suggested someone mess with my phone to set an alarm ring-tone, sorry to burst your bubble :P And no, I don't actually WANT to die - I was just thinking about this the other day and saying to myself, would I actually rather die in my sleep than wake up in the middle of the night to a terrible noise and have to maybe evacuate my house and call 911 and probably dissolve into a sobbing wreck due to all the anxiety? No, death is not the better solution, obviously, but irrational feelings tend to disregard logic.
By JulieClaire - 11/03/2011 01:44
By ohman - 17/07/2009 17:29 - United States
TMI
By Anonymous - 04/01/2011 08:05 - Australia
By sicky - 27/01/2016 05:02 - United States - Salt Lake City
Creep alert
By creepedouthostess - 17/06/2009 07:12 - United States
By Rusty - 12/12/2015 00:49 - United States
By Anonymous - 07/05/2009 10:44 - Malaysia
By ewwww - 27/04/2009 04:08 - United States
By KieRendan - 25/05/2012 19:59 - United States - Rio Rancho
Tyranny
By luh8r - 09/04/2009 14:38 - Canada
By seriously? - 27/05/2014 22:23 - United States - Manassas
Poker face
By therealducktape - 20/08/2010 22:03 - France
By mj - 05/06/2011 20:20 - United States
Am I being detained?
By JimmyT - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Norway - Bergen
By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto
Here comes the sunbed
By Aiaiii - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Germany
Try it, you never know…
By Anonymous - 02/01/2013 10:34 - United States - Sanford
By handymandy - 19/01/2012 11:44 - United States
By uhoh.. - 22/03/2015 19:51 - Canada - Nanaimo
Keywords
57- well you seem to have quite a good memory, ha. I've gotta say I'm thankful that the morning sickness has subsided so I don't have to drop everything and run for the toilet or for fresh air (except on a Saturday for some reason). Now I'm just gassy it would seem. Oh joy. And forgetful. Speaking of which I just remembered I put eggs on the stove to boil a while ago and forgot about them so now I have to go D: