Love: Today, it's my anniversary. I've been a single cat-lady for exactly...

By catlady - 09/01/2012 16:56 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my anniversary. I've been a single cat-lady for exactly one year. FML

agreeclassic 30 795

vote type 1 8 512

End-of-year festivities: New Year's Eve fun and frolics
End the year on a high note with anecdotes where every New Year's Eve firecracker is synonymous with laughter! More…

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By Nicole557 - 03/11/2011 10:56 - United States

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Today, I celebrated the new year. Alone. FML

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By garfwebba - 03/01/2010 01:17 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend didn't get me a present. He did, however, get me a card from our cat. He signed it "Have a purrrrfect birthday." Then he left to go to work. I was alone all day long. FML

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By Loner - 05/12/2021 14:00

Today, I spent the thirty second consecutive day in a row seeing no one but my cat. FML

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By CatLover<3 - 18/06/2013 23:27 - United States - Cibolo

Today, I tried to explain to my cat why I was single, but then I realized why. FML

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noncomposmentis 6

Monday 9 January 2012 18:53

Better stay single than to be in an unhappy relationship.

Savra_fml 17

Monday 9 January 2012 19:20

That is a terrible attempt at a joke, spelling, and grammar.....all in one.

Comments

lovestheice 0

Wednesday 11 January 2012 6:29

PinkFun1969 9

Wednesday 11 January 2012 8:06

Oh Just love cats!

Princesshamster 9

Wednesday 11 January 2012 23:52

Kitties ARE adorable though! :D

LN666 2

Tuesday 17 January 2012 19:23

think uu need to get out more :)

ering17 7

Sunday 22 January 2012 18:49

congrats!!!

simonelli 9

Wednesday 1 February 2012 3:18

Aww congrats! That's going to be me when I get older lol

trendkilla254 4

Friday 6 April 2012 18:53

u fail... single cat lady < multiple cat lady

nooneknowskay 7

Thursday 14 June 2012 7:40

Don't worry, I've been a single cat lady for two years now :/

nicolefry10 1

Tuesday 10 July 2012 3:26

HAPPY ANNIVERSITY!!

bridgetv25 8

Wednesday 18 July 2012 6:06

Mine just passed this mo :(

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Today, I was babysitting my 6-year-old brother and was playing Mario. When I won, he called me a cunt. I was in shock and asked him where he learnt the word. He said from me when I was driving. He then told my mum that I taught him a new word. Easy to say, I'm in big trouble. FML

agreeclassic 13 382

vote type 1 4 990

Today, buying lemon juice, beetroot, and ice cream, I was delayed at the self-checkout for an “alcohol ID check.” Indeed, I would very much like to meet the person who can scoff the amount of Tiramisu Ice Cream you’d need in order to get drunk off the 2% wine it contains. My calculations have it at 10-plus liters. FML

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Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML

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Today, I was scrolling through my Instagram timeline and saw a picture of my friend in a ridiculous wig. I left a comment telling her how stupid the wig looked, but how great it was to have a friend with a sense of humour. She replied, telling me it wasn't a wig, it was her new hairstyle. FML

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Today, I woke up to my husband slowly pulling my blanket off me. I thought he was being romantic until I realized it was because the cat had puked all over me while I was sleeping. FML

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Today, in a scene worthy of any comedy movie, I slipped and landed on my ass right on the garden rake my husband left in the grass. Sounds funny, right? Well, I have 9 holes in my ass and thigh that need stitches. One of them came close to poking my femoral artery, so technically I almost died. FML

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vote type 1 91