Miscellaneous: Today, I was having a rough day, so I decided to go to the movies...

By zaynemaliksvagina - 24/06/2015 17:10 - United States - Shrewsbury

Today, I was having a rough day, so I decided to go to the movies to unwind. 15 minutes in, some assmunch behind me said "This movie sucks!" then dumped his drink over my head and ran out. FML

agreeclassic 30 436

vote type 1 1 891

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By anonymous - 17/12/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, I went to the movies with my friends. All throughout, some guy kept making weird sounds and breathing deeply. Midway through the movie, he got even louder. Just as I was about to snap, chunks of vomit sprayed over my chair and shoulders. FML

agreeclassic 36 059

vote type 1 2 534

I mean, come on…

By Anonymous - 19/12/2025 20:00

Today, I went to see a movie but took my phone out a few times to check my socials. Apparently the asshole behind me didn’t like that, because he ripped my phone out of my hands, dropped it in my soda, then just sat back in his seat like nothing happened. FML

agreeclassic 47

vote type 1 797

Movie night

By ditched - 17/08/2009 19:49 - Canada

Today, I went to the movies with my boyfriend. We went inside the theatre and he saw a couple of his friends. Instead of saying hi and coming back to watch the movie with me, he ditched me for them. When I reminded him he was forgetting something, he grabbed the popcorn out of my hands and left. FML

agreeclassic 59 181

vote type 1 6 151

By escortedout - 23/10/2010 23:14 - United States

Today, I was at a movie theater. I heard some obnoxious people talking in front of me. After about 5 minutes, I began throwing popcorn at a group of suspected people. As I was escorted out, I realized that the obnoxious people were in the background of the movie. FML

agreeclassic 6 129

vote type 1 47 408

Weird simile but OK

By fuck you, bitchcake - 10/11/2013 18:26 - Canada - Dartmouth

Today, at the movies, some asswipe kept throwing candy at me. After 20 minutes of it, I got up and went over to get him to stop. Good news: his balls vanished faster than a politician's spine immediately after being elected. Bad news: I got kicked out for "starting a disturbance". FML

agreeclassic 41 365

vote type 1 3 790

By sheyo - 05/03/2009 01:13 - Canada

Today, I went to the movies with some girlfriends. The guy behind us was making these pervy, heavy breathing noises, so we threw some popcorn at him. When the movie finished, we saw him in a wheelchair - with a breathing tube sticking out of his neck. FML

agreeclassic 34 516

vote type 1 315 222

Maybe he's into that...

By pissypants - 25/11/2017 19:00

Today, at the movies on a date, I drank all my soda and waited too long. I couldn't take it anymore and quickly got up, knocking my date's popcorn on the floor, and ran to the bathroom. I didn’t make it and went home in shame. It’s better he thinks I stood him up. FML

agreeclassic 2 149

vote type 1 3 557

By power corrupts... - 07/08/2011 20:29 - Czech Republic

Today, at my job as a movie theater attendant, my boss finally eased up and let me sit in on one of the movies. One woman kept laughing out loud every other line. After ten minutes of her braying like a dying horse, I got up and had her ejected from the theater. I'm a terrible person. FML

agreeclassic 34 077

vote type 1 12 058

Dude, STFU!

By Cyberdeeder - 13/10/2008 08:19

Today, at the cinema, I sat next to a guy who couldn’t stand a minute without laughing or making comments about the film. FML

agreeclassic 75 151

vote type 1 20 272

By BC94 - 16/07/2012 04:21 - United States - Mcminnville

Today, I went to a movie with this guy. He was late so the only seats available were the ones in the very front which he refused to sit in. As we were looking for two seats, he spotted one near the back and sat down, leaving me to sit by myself in the front. FML

agreeclassic 36 574

vote type 1 2 848

lowkeybelieber 7

Wednesday 24 June 2015 23:46

Look on the bright side. He lost 10 dollars with that drink.

Cads1 24

Wednesday 24 June 2015 23:51

You are complaining about receiving a free drink?

Comments

karacakal2 30

Thursday 25 June 2015 1:55

What an asshole. Hopefully your day got better aftetwards OP.

Pretty_momma 6

Thursday 25 June 2015 2:04

Did you just so happen to be watching 50 Shades Of Grey?

daddysgirl243 21

Thursday 25 June 2015 2:05

now you're not the only one having a bad day

alex_gen 39

Thursday 25 June 2015 2:18

What theater did you go to to watch Twilight?

johnfulcher90 12

Thursday 25 June 2015 2:53

must have been a really bad movie to dump a 15 dollar drink out

johncanact 13

Thursday 25 June 2015 3:47

He knew you liked zayn Malik

Rawani 7

Thursday 25 June 2015 3:47

What an Ridiculous situation

Flint_Monroe 9

Thursday 25 June 2015 3:47

"Assmunch." That's a new one.

Ava_Darkflame 26

Thursday 25 June 2015 4:38

..... Zayn Malik's ******? O.o

Textastrophe 13

Thursday 25 June 2015 4:50

Assmunch, Good word

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Today, my little sister put me in charge of keeping her fighting fish alive. It would've been an easy task if it weren't for my crazy ex-boyfriend drunkenly forcing his way into my house, vomiting into the fishbowl and killing the fish. Only ten more hours until my family gets home. FML

agreeclassic 2 027

vote type 1 518

Today, the weird guy with the 'Elvis in Las Vegas' haircut-and-sunglasses combo who cleans tables at my work tried to hit on me. This is the most interest any man has given me in a year. FML

agreeclassic 735

vote type 1 217

Today, I went to hug my husband and give him a kiss. He flinched away and asked what I was doing, because I apparently never hug him, so he thought I might be about to prank him or something. Now I feel bad. FML

agreeclassic 112

vote type 1 647

Today, I knew my girlfriend's dad owned a security company. What I did not know was that he treats his employees like family, so my girlfriend has about 40 scary uncles who’ve known her since she was a baby, and most of them are ex-military. FML

agreeclassic 2 119

vote type 1 411

Today, I got back from an 8-month deployment ready for relaxation and lots of sex with my husband. He said he’s come to realise he likes living alone, didn’t miss me much, and hasn’t been looking forward to me coming home. He gave me divorce papers and kicked me out to go sleep in a hotel. FML

agreeclassic 1 468

vote type 1 186

Today, I was babysitting a 7 year-old girl and we were eating chocolate covered nuts. She kept on chewing the nuts and wondered where the chocolate was. I told her to taste the chocolate you suck on the nuts. Then her parents came home and the first thing she said was, "I learned how to suck nuts!" FML

agreeclassic 57 546

vote type 1 10 870

Similar FMLs

I mean, come on…

Movie night

Weird simile but OK

Maybe he's into that...

Dude, STFU!

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