Health: Today, I stuck my hand out the car window and noticed my arm...

By windthroughmyflab - 13/05/2015 23:19 - United States

Today, I stuck my hand out the car window and noticed my arm fat flapping in the wind. FML

agreeclassic 25 730

vote type 1 10 482

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By Anonymous - 26/01/2012 16:45 - United States

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

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Cartoonish

By You knock me off my feet - 13/04/2023 20:00 - United States

Today, it's so windy, I actually fell over and nearly flew into the street the moment I walked outside. FML

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By it'sabitwindy - 09/12/2011 06:05 - United States

Today, I added "a road sign" to my ever-growing list of "Things which have hit my car as a result of the wind." FML

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By Anonymous - 24/02/2014 15:21 - United States

Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML

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By numb fingers - 15/04/2016 05:54 - United States - Banning

Today, as I was stretching, I realized my hand can reach all the way up to touch the fan, when it was on, and going full speed. FML

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Could you stop doing that, please?

By Scabs - 09/08/2010 16:54 - United States

Today, I was in the car with my parents' friends. I was in the back with my window down when I felt something strange hit my ear. I then realized that the person sitting in front of me was picking their scab and throwing it out the window. FML

agreeclassic 31 825

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By Anonymous - 31/12/2015 21:26 - New Zealand

Today, I found out how it feels to have a car door slammed shut on my hand, breaking two of my fingers. Hint: it's fucking painful. FML

agreeclassic 22 189

vote type 1 2 041

By Anonymous - 12/11/2009 11:17 - Australia

Today, I realized that I hadn't shaved in so long that when the wind blew, the hairs on my legs moved in the breeze. FML

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By Chris Altenbach - 23/02/2010 20:55 - United States

Today, I got off from work and noticed that the weather finally warmed up after the recent snowstorm. I hopped into my car and rolled down the windows. When I opened the sun roof, a foot of snow came falling into my car. FML

agreeclassic 7 435

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Barf

By epicfailureismyl - 05/04/2018 15:00

Today, whilst driving, I had the sudden urge to vomit. As I pulled over I wound my window down, stuck my head out, and emptied my stomach. At least I would have if I had wound down the driver's window instead of the back window. FML

agreeclassic 3 553

vote type 1 954

organizse 28

Thursday 14 May 2015 12:26

Hey, pretty soon you'll have wings.

1dvos_grl3 21

Thursday 14 May 2015 12:28

You're one step closer to flying!

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Chocherz 12

Saturday 16 May 2015 21:52

blame inertia

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Today, it was my first driving lesson. I was so bad, the police stopped me and accused me of being drunk, because I almost crashed into the pole in front of them. FML

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Today, I was rejected from the 25th rental I applied to in the last two months. I give up. Guess I'm stuck living with my mother forever. FML

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Today, I work on a cruise ship, and I just learned that we have a morgue on board. How did I learn that? It's right next to the crew laundry room, and I opened the wrong door. It was occupied. FML

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Today, I was at my new apartment. My fiancé was coming home so I filled the apartment with candles and put on some sexy music. When he came up to my door, I answered the door, naked. What I didn't know was that he was bringing his dad to see the new apartment. FML

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Today, I was trying to relax on the beach after a stressful day, just to overhear a bunch of kids near me start fighting over who pooped in the hole they'd dug in the sand. FML

agreeclassic 770

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Today, I have a tattoo of my daughter, who died when she was 11, and I had to have surgery on that body area. I told the surgeon very clearly to cut around the tattoo and he assured me he would. Woke up and the bastard had cut through my daughter's face, and half her face is now under scars and stitches. FML

agreeclassic 1 517

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Cartoonish

Could you stop doing that, please?

Barf

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