Health: Today, I received a box in the mail from my mom which I assumed...

By Loot - 17/02/2009 00:26 - United States

Today, I received a box in the mail from my mom which I assumed was a care package. It was a scale to encourage me to lose weight. FML

agreeclassic 36 981

vote type 1 6 061

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End the year on a high note with anecdotes where every New Year's Eve firecracker is synonymous with laughter! More…

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By nick - 12/05/2010 09:49 - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to go on a diet to lose some weight before summer. This was followed by the arrival of a giant parcel full of candy from my mother. FML

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By skinnyguy23 - 10/09/2014 22:40 - United States - Briarcliff Manor

Today, I received a package. When my mom asked what I had bought, I had told her that I had ordered dumbbells and was going to start lifting. She laughed her way into the kitchen. FML

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By fatman - 10/08/2010 02:29 - United States

Today, my mom signed me up for Weight Watchers as a surprise birthday present. FML

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By Fatty - 28/12/2011 07:57 - United States

Today, I found out that I've been using a "Trick Scale" that my family bought to boost my self esteem so I'd think I was losing weight. I found this out at my physical, where I learned I have actually gained ten pounds. FML

agreeclassic 31 562

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By Anonymous - 14/07/2009 11:41 - United States

Today, I received an email with a link to a story about a man who lost 650 pounds. I ignored it, until I saw who sent it. My mom, with the message "Maybe there's hope for you." FML

agreeclassic 46 792

vote type 1 8 857

By Anonymous - 13/03/2015 15:02 - United States

Today, after several months of eating right, exercising, and weight loss, my mother has yet again arrived at my house, unannounced and with a very sugary cake. She's been doing this most weeks since I lost 50 pounds. FML

agreeclassic 32 709

vote type 1 2 844

As a treat

By CrumblGirl - 06/03/2025 15:00 - United States

Today, I bought myself a Crumbl cookie as a treat for losing 20lbs. Upon seeing it, my mom screamed at me for cheating on my diet and how I was going to "gain all the weight back" and insisted she eat some of it to "help me out." She left behind a tiny morsel of the cookie with a chocolate chip chunk. FML

agreeclassic 454

vote type 1 145

By Angelica - 26/05/2011 03:19 - Canada

Today, I finally got the wedding dress I've been waiting months to see. It turns out that my mom ordered the dress 2 sizes smaller than my size, this way it will be "an incentive to lose weight". FML

agreeclassic 39 586

vote type 1 6 174

Cheers

By Anonymous - 13/03/2016 08:25 - Australia - Aspley

Today, for my birthday, my friend bought me a book on how to lose weight. FML

agreeclassic 19 390

vote type 1 3 397

Tact

By FalkensLabyrinth - 03/02/2021 19:57 - United States - Gardner

Today, my mother offered to give my overweight girlfriend the workout DVDs that she no longer needs. FML

agreeclassic 792

vote type 1 215

Seegtease 0

Tuesday 17 February 2009 10:09

Free stuff from mom, why are you complaining? Motive is irrelevant. Free stuff.

Sgt_Schadenfreud 0

Monday 9 March 2009 2:25

Sounds like you've already had enough care packages, dear.

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dabears1011234 27

Thursday 21 August 2014 0:13

Time to get to work!

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Today, I attempted to threaten my daughter's boyfriend to keep him from breaking her heart. I'm a 230-pound former soldier. He's a karate black belt. My family watched me get beat up by a 120-pound teenager. FML

agreeclassic 2 355

vote type 1 7 969

Today, my exchange student asked me for a ride to a party at a friend's house that I didn't know about. When I said, "Oh, just let me change", she replied, "I just need the ride, you're not invited." FML

agreeclassic 34 446

vote type 1 3 255

Today, I took my girlfriend to Taco Bell since it's her favorite place to eat. I thought it'd be cute to get one of the sauce packets that says "Will you marry me?" on it and give it to her all cute-like. She thought it was adorable. While we were leaving, she threw it out. FML

agreeclassic 36 000

vote type 1 25 935

Today, my girlfriend, who I've loved and dated for over a year, confessed that she's actually straight as an arrow. All this time, she's basically been using me as an accessory to enhance her "social status" and make her guy friends horny. FML

agreeclassic 41 553

vote type 1 4 978

Today, I found out that my best friend's mom doesn't wear pyjamas when I got up to go get a glass of water in the middle of the night, at the same time she did. FML

agreeclassic 28 085

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Today, I was having a funny conversation with a guy I had met on Xbox. I told him the state I lived in, and he said, "Don't tell me that, I might stalk you." He wasn't kidding. He has somehow found out my phone number, and my address. He says he's going to send me flowers. FML

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