Love: Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come...

By dude - 20/01/2009 14:01 - France

Today, I called up my ex girlfriend to ask her if I could come round hers to get my pyjamas back. She replied: "I'm keeping them just in case..." - "In case of what?" - "In case I want to dress up like an asshole". FML

agreeclassic 11 541

vote type 1 28 983

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By Anonymous - 24/08/2014 05:51 - United States - Hicksville

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By Anonymous - 27/08/2009 19:28 - United States

Today, I lazily answered the door in my pajamas. It was my elderly neighbor asking to borrow a can opener. Despite the strange and unwarranted scowl she was giving me I obliged. It wasn't until after she had left that I notice my penis was completely sticking out through the flap in my pants. FML

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maiden_girl 5

Saturday 14 February 2009 16:10

Hahaha! You must've really pissed her off... what did you do exactly that made you an asshole? I'm curious now.

deartragedy51 0

Sunday 8 February 2009 7:58

psh. i should have done the exact thing with my ex. xD

Comments

SocialMoth 0

Tuesday 3 May 2011 2:51

Genius!

doyougiveacrap 0

Saturday 30 July 2011 4:33

ownage

briissocoollike 8

Friday 12 August 2011 23:25

Haha ur ex gf is awesome..by the way ydi for apparently being an asshole

woosah 16

Friday 16 September 2011 7:29

Many, many people. Many

SummerTime69 5

Monday 24 October 2011 6:43

LOLOLOLOL

Coffeebang 17

Monday 6 February 2012 10:55

LMFAO

xNephilim 18

Saturday 25 February 2012 20:58

I call whatever I wear to sleep in pajamas. Doesn't matter if it's shorts and a t-shirt or, GASP, actual pjs.

mckenseymoore 0

Monday 12 March 2012 5:41

Owned!

polkadot3155 6

Tuesday 27 March 2012 17:04

maybe they broke up with you because you can't spell pajamas..

caity_pie 12

Thursday 26 July 2012 12:39

Actually, that's not true. The American spelling is pajamas, while the British spelling is pyjamas.

officestoner 2

Friday 30 March 2012 4:26

ROFLMAO

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Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Love Coworkers Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Jealousy Underwear Parents Thief Intimacy Suspicious Sex Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

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Today, while driving my son and his friend home, I was so frantic to pee, I was bouncing up and down in my seat. I stopped and ran into a store but it was too late. There was a line and I made it 11 seconds. I was radiating heat from the humiliation of walking past dozens of people after peeing my pants. I even apologized. FML

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Today, I was shopping at Costco for a romantic evening with my girlfriend, I bought some flowers, dinner, and a super pack of condoms, At the register behind me, I heard somebody say, "Good thing my daughter has a responsible boyfriend." It was my girlfriend's father. FML

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Today, while trying to take my Christmas tree down, I learned that at some point during the last few weeks, it became home to a colony of green ants. I'm now covered in bites and terrified to go anywhere near it. FML

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Today, my dad went through all the trouble of sneaking onto my laptop and photoshopping a bong into my Facebook profile picture, apparently just so he could win a €20 bet with my mom, that hinged on her grounding me by December. FML

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