Health: Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle....

By Anonymous - 26/06/2012 05:44 - United States

Today, I burned my nose. How? I tried sniffing a lit candle. FML

agreeclassic 8 222

vote type 1 52 419

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By shiiiiit - 15/11/2009 09:23 - United States

Today, I was having trouble blowing out the last of the several candles on my bedside table. Exasperated, I blew as hard as I could, which sent hot wax from the other candles shooting into the air, all over my face and into my eyes. FML

agreeclassic 25 179

vote type 1 12 541

By Anonymous - 30/11/2011 03:13 - United States

Today, I decided to light a candle in my room. Since fire intrigues me, I put an old brochure into it. Paper burns fast, and now my carpet has a big, black burn mark. FML

agreeclassic 7 291

vote type 1 72 570

By anonymous - 12/03/2012 08:03 - United States

Today, I burned my butt on the heater when I tried to warm up after my shower. FML

agreeclassic 9 686

vote type 1 27 522

By Asshole hornet - 28/10/2013 20:18 - United States - Marblehead

Today, a hornet thought it would be fun to fly into a candle that I had lit. As the hornet burned to death, it flung its charred body at my face, which is more painful than it sounds. FML

agreeclassic 44 394

vote type 1 3 506

By anonymous - 05/02/2014 02:48 - United States

Today, due to the dry weather, my nose became dry and began to bleed so I plugged it with toilet paper and went about my business. Forgetting about it, I later went out to smoke a cigarette. Not paying attention, I lit the toilet paper on fire as well. FML

agreeclassic 38 931

vote type 1 45 116

But… why?

By Fmylife - 06/07/2011 09:17 - United States

Today, I have a cold. Trying to clear out my stuffy nose, I tried putting mouthwash in my nose. Thinking it was an awesome idea, I put some more in. I then starting screaming in pain due to the extreme burning in my nostrils. FML

agreeclassic 9 264

vote type 1 121 022

By opposableouch - 27/10/2009 18:46 - United Kingdom

Today, I sliced a deep gash into my thumb while carving up bagels. After putting a plaster on, I returned to my room to relax, where I lit a candle. The flame from my new lighter shot up, and set fire to the plaster on my thumb. Now I have a cut AND several burns. FML

agreeclassic 33 010

vote type 1 7 983

Pucker up

By It feels fucking awful - 18/12/2025 12:00

Today, on a whim, I decided to try to light a fart on fire. I now know how it feels to take a dump when you have a burn directly on your asshole. FML

agreeclassic 45

vote type 1 527

What? Why?

By Anonymous - 16/07/2024 05:00 - United States - Bakersfield

Today, I lit a used tissue on fire in my room. Eventually, the fire became kinda of large (it was a big tissue) and when I blew it out, it fell on the carpet. Now I have a burn stain on it. FML

agreeclassic 53

vote type 1 1 106

By Username - 09/05/2011 17:23 - China

Today, I made a cup of tea at work. Whilst talking to a workmate, I took a sip of the tea, which I had forgotten was boiling hot, and laughed at the same time, causing it to come out of my nose. I have blistered my whole mouth and even burnt my nostrils. FML

agreeclassic 33 252

vote type 1 10 558

beccaishereyay 11

Tuesday 26 June 2012 11:46

Keyword: tried.

lenluigi 6

Tuesday 26 June 2012 11:49

if you can't sniff it try tasting it

Comments

newbiehere99 6

Tuesday 26 June 2012 16:37

Shouldn't be so nosy ..

babalooisbabaloo 5

Tuesday 26 June 2012 16:40

Stupidity at its finest.

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Tuesday 26 June 2012 16:47

It's a little hard to feel bad for you. If you're old enough to be around lit candles, you're old enough to know better.

opheliac93 8

Tuesday 26 June 2012 16:49

Haha I know your pain OP I've done that before.

wrinklytesticle 7

Tuesday 26 June 2012 16:50

Why would you even do that? You totally deserve it.

stfuNOWplease 6

Tuesday 26 June 2012 17:02

BURN!!! In my Kelso voice

sqwamper 0

Tuesday 26 June 2012 17:11

I speak from experiance when I say that sniffing candles will get you higher than trying to smoke a flashlight.

Pewdiepiebro 4

Tuesday 26 June 2012 17:20

I've done that. Sucks, doesn't it?

draklin300 3

Tuesday 26 June 2012 17:37

this isn't really a fml. your just a retard.

lexi365 20

Tuesday 26 June 2012 17:38

I just seem to lose more faith in humanity every time I go on FML...

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I went to the dentist. I parked my car in what I thought was the dentist's car park. It was actually the car park for the business next door. I had to watch them clamp my car from the dentist's chair. FML

agreeclassic 32 765

vote type 1 6 805

Today, I was confronted by my superiors for spending a "suspicious" amount of time in the bathroom every day. Not only did I have to take the test, but I also had to send in a doctor's note proving that I have a bowel condition I'd hoped to keep secret. FML

agreeclassic 3 775

vote type 1 305

Today, I shattered my ankle while mountain biking with my boyfriend. As I lay writhing on the ground, waiting for the ambulance, he traced the outline of my thigh and said, "You should get this suctioned out while you're in the hospital." FML

agreeclassic 1 142

vote type 1 160

Today, my friends staged an intervention. I'm not on drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, and I own my own house. My car is paid for and my job pays well. Apparently, I need an intervention because my life is not where they want it to be, which involves me being married with children. FML

agreeclassic 41 398

vote type 1 3 583

Today, my kids got me a dog to replace the dog who died last year. I don’t like dogs, our old dog was my deceased wife’s dog, and I never liked it. I cared for the dog until it died of old age and fully intended to never get another one. Now I have a hyperactive puppy destroying my house. FML

agreeclassic 782

vote type 1 206

Today, my 8-year-old son told me to grow a pair and man up. FML

agreeclassic 29 374

vote type 1 7 728

Similar FMLs

But… why?

Pucker up

What? Why?

TOP COMMENTS

Comments