Intimacy: Today, after we'd let an author rent out our cabin, we read in...

By Username - 28/02/2011 05:44

Today, after we'd let an author rent out our cabin, we read in the book of poems he wrote while staying that he'd described how he enjoyed sitting on our table naked. The same table we often eat off. FML

agreeclassic 32 465

vote type 1 5 183

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By Phoellie - 28/08/2009 11:43 - United Kingdom

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Today, my boyfriend and I were sexting, and he asked me if I would be naked and waiting for him when he got home. When he told me he was on his way, I took my clothes off and got into bed. What he didn’t tell me was he was bringing friends to pick up a desk from our place for their office. FML

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By Jonnygiant - 14/03/2009 01:45 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower after basketball practice. When I got out of the shower I thought no one was home so I thought it might be fun to walk around the house completely naked. I walk downstairs and my mom was eating dinner. Along with 20 other members of her bookclub. FML

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By anonymous - 14/01/2012 11:42 - Australia

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By Anonymous - 26/10/2020 19:58

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By Anonymous - 04/04/2009 12:08 - Australia

Today, I slept over at my boyfriend's house and he offered to give me a massage, as he'd found a book on sensual massage and wanted to test it out on me. When he went to the bathroom, I found the book open on his desk- at "Massage to eliminate cellulite". FML

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By Nikki - 18/03/2009 03:15 - United States

Today, I woke up, completely naked, in bed with a guy I met the night before. We were both drunk the night before and I had agreed to go home with him. The reason I woke up was that someone was knocking on his bedroom door. Turns out he lives with his mom and she made us pancakes. FML

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By best_friend - 25/07/2011 06:43 - United States

Today, I went to my friend's house because his family was having a move away party for him. Everything was going good until his dad decided to give a toast. Including an anecdote about how he walked in on us watching porn together. FML

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chrstygrl06 10

Monday 28 February 2011 12:33

You should eat off plates. I find they're much handier.

MauriceWinifred 0

Monday 28 February 2011 12:19

so? clean it. And it's not like you don't use plates. what's the big deal, ugh.

Comments

freethetech 4

Thursday 14 July 2011 20:50

It's common sense to clean it after renting it out. Even if family stays at our condo, we still clean it!

mtbrown 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 4:19

Keep to your business

Albarufus 13

Tuesday 15 May 2012 11:41

Just clean it before you eat?

yupitssoph 18

Tuesday 19 June 2012 4:37

Hippie bastards.

ConfusedCat 11

Tuesday 24 November 2015 5:55

Poets are weird.

fantasyworld 37

Friday 4 December 2015 23:31

Clean it.

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Today, my boyfriend and I compared our No Shave November body hair. This is how I found out that my legs are hairier than his. FML

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Today, I skipped class and went to back my apartment early. I found out that my roommate had broken into my room and was laying in my bed wearing my underwear, taking pictures of herself. Apparently, she's been doing it all semester. FML

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Today, I was shopping at Costco for a romantic evening with my girlfriend, I bought some flowers, dinner, and a super pack of condoms, At the register behind me, I heard somebody say, "Good thing my daughter has a responsible boyfriend." It was my girlfriend's father. FML

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Today, you know that cute video of the girl waking up from anaesthesia, seeing her boyfriend and calling him cute even though she’s drugged up? Yeah, good for him. Meanwhile, my husband just woke up from his surgery all drugged up, looked at me, and said, "Ew, Grandma, I thought you were dead." FML

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Today, my boyfriend broke up with me using the "it's not you, it's me" speech with a slight variation, saying instead, "It's not me, it's you. And yes, I meant to say it that way round." FML

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