Transportation, Gross and Farts: Stay home

Stay home

By TipTopPost - 02/09/2025 22:00

Today, I was sitting on the bus and the guy in front of me turned around and asked for a dollar. I politely said no. Now he won’t stop farting. I literally hate leaving my house anymore. FML

agreeclassic 396

vote type 1 75

The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Similar FMLs

By Anonymous - 07/12/2010 04:53 - United States

Today, while sitting on the bus a stranger sat next to me, farted, put his hand under his butt to smell what it was like, and then sniffed it throughout the whole ride while glancing at me. FML

agreeclassic 33 121

vote type 1 2 566

By eewww - 06/05/2011 15:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I took a 40 minute bus ride home from work. The first 20 minutes were spent listening to the drunk man behind me moan uncontrollably and belch. The last 20 minutes were spent trying to ignore the vomit he left on my back as he got up to leave. FML

agreeclassic 38 797

vote type 1 3 713

By methane overload - 19/01/2013 01:32 - United States

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

agreeclassic 40 238

vote type 1 3 835

Nutter on the bus

By Kevin - 18/03/2021 21:30

Today, some guy at the bus stop screamed at me because the bus was coming and I wasn’t wearing my mask. I was standing 25 feet from the stop finishing a smoke and there was no one around me. When I sat down on the bus, with my mask on, he stared me down the whole ride. FML

agreeclassic 943

vote type 1 182

By Anonymous - 26/08/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was riding the public bus and a really fat, smelly guy sat next to me. He put his arm around my shoulder and asked me if I was single. My stop wasn't for three more miles. FML

agreeclassic 38 909

vote type 1 3 725

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

agreeclassic 37 918

vote type 1 3 420

By ugly - 10/07/2011 06:03 - United States

Today, a total stranger on the bus called me hideous and threw a soda in my face. I only asked him if the seat next to him was taken. FML

agreeclassic 37 198

vote type 1 3 516

Perfume Allergy Man strikes again!

By Lor - 09/10/2019 06:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, a woman got on the bus wearing extremely strong perfume and sat in the seat in front of me. The gentleman I was sitting next to began violently sneezing, so much so that he eventually sneeze-vomited all over my lap and backpack. FML

agreeclassic 1 862

vote type 1 175

By WhatsThatSmell - 25/02/2011 13:25 - Australia

Today, I took a busy train into the city. I was lucky enough to get a seat. People were forced to stand in the aisle in front of me, and the person directly opposite me, whose butt was level with my head farted in my face. Twice. FML

agreeclassic 35 852

vote type 1 4 525

Trash

By Anonymous - 11/12/2011 06:42 - United States

Today, I rode the public bus. When I got off, I put my hood up only to discover that the old man who sat behind me had used my hood as a trashcan for his gum and used Kleenex. I can't get the gum out of my hair. FML

agreeclassic 35 844

vote type 1 2 672

Wadlaen 23

Tuesday 2 September 2025 23:23

I don't know if the dollar would have made him not fart, but it sounds like it would have been worth it...

kevinwm0 15

Saturday 6 September 2025 4:51

Sounds like it's time for a game of Dueling Buttholes

Comments

Wadlaen 23

Tuesday 2 September 2025 23:23

I don't know if the dollar would have made him not fart, but it sounds like it would have been worth it...

kevinwm0 15

Saturday 6 September 2025 4:51

Sounds like it's time for a game of Dueling Buttholes

VDM sur Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

Top

Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop and I noticed that there was a bug on the guys face in front of me. Trying to be nice I lightly smacked it off. His reaction was to punch me in the face. Repeatedly. FML

agreeclassic 10 536

vote type 1 46 651

Today, I bought a small bottle of liquor to share with my husband to celebrate our move. It took three hours at the store as the cashier, manager, GM, and a police officer checked my ID believing it was fake. I'm 25. FML

agreeclassic 4 202

vote type 1 315

Today, I finally received the last check from my insurance company after my house flooded 10 months ago. Tonight my house flooded again. FML

agreeclassic 51 314

vote type 1 4 304

Today, my mom decided to go against every promise she's made to everyone once again and left us in financial ruin. How? She took advantage of my kindness, and didn't pay any of the money she owes me for driving my car, and for so much more. I'm more than $2,000 in debt now. FML

agreeclassic 931

vote type 1 244

Today, I’m a short but decently attractive male but I can’t gain enough confidence to approach women, because of the trauma from female classmates treating me terribly in high school when I was still short, but also still going through puberty. FML

agreeclassic 768

vote type 1 224

Today, my boyfriend discovered how to make me queef on demand when he has his fingers inside me. I now feel like my love life has been replaced with fart sounds. FML

agreeclassic 36 818

vote type 1 4 494