Miscellaneous: Smells like… victory - FML

Smells like… victory

By sickofthesmelltoo - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - Australia - Fitzroy

Today, my friends confronted me and told me that they no longer want to visit my house because my dog smells really disgusting. I didn't have the heart to tell them that the smell is actually my parents, who have been trying to "save water" by only showering once a fortnight. FML

agreeclassic 37 066

vote type 1 3 168

Watch out for the New Year
It's time to say goodbye to the current year, but when the goodbye goes wrong, it's a different story. Be careful, you might want to stay at home. More…

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By sammyducks227 - 08/11/2013 07:49 - United States - Saint Charles

Today, I've invited friends and family to my birthday party. I've also come home to find that my parents didn't pay the water bill. I either have to tell everyone I know that they are uninvited or not to take dumps in my house. FML

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Weird family time

By Anonymous - 12/02/2014 17:26 - United States - Louisville

Today, my in-laws kept mocking me for being "too clean" because I take a shower every day. They think I'm weird and kept saying things like, "Be careful when you hug your daughter, she might squeak!" and calling me names like "water-wasting bitch." They haven't stopped all day. FML

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The pits

By Anonymous - 14/01/2024 08:00 - United States

Today, my mom revoked my shower privileges for a week, all because I'm “using too much water.” I'm the kind of person who will smell like garbage after one skipped shower. FML

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By Shampoodle - 11/10/2017 21:45

Today, I found out that my mom uses my incredibly expensive conditioner to wash her two dogs every single weekend. No wonder they smell so good. FML

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By Anonymous - 17/10/2018 17:30

Today, I'm on holiday with my boyfriend's family for the first time. Unfortunately, I have diarrhoea and keep leaving extremely smelly farts around the house. I blame the dog every time, but I think they're catching on. FML

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Smoke 'em if you've got 'em

By Dumbweed - 28/08/2009 04:42 - United States

Today, my mom told me she was getting tired of the smell of marijuana in the house. So I confessed and told her I'll never bring it home again. She was talking about my neighbors. FML

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Smells like victory

By Ready to break up - 08/01/2021 05:01 - United States - Hesperia

Today, my girlfriend and her best friend have been in a contest to see who can go the longest without showering. They’ve just hit day 22. They smell so bad, I can’t stand to be in the same room with them anymore. I'm really about to dump her. FML

agreeclassic 1 318

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By ===== - 14/01/2014 17:59 - Pakistan - Karachi

Today, the sewage pipe busted on the side of our house, spew fecal matter and the condoms I recently flushed. My parents now refuse to talk to me, and won't let my girlfriend anywhere near the house. FML

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By Ishowet - 31/05/2017 12:00 - United States - Hialeah

Today, my five-year-old son told me that I smell bad and asked me to take a shower so I wouldn't attract bugs into the house. I had just showered. FML

agreeclassic 2 989

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Clean break

By Anonymous - 28/09/2020 11:02

Today, I'd taken this girl I'd recently met through Facebook dating to my family cabin. Apparently, her hygiene wasn't that great, because she didn't shower all weekend. The entire 4-hour ride back to her house was miserable, as every time she opened up her legs it smelled like a dead rat. I'm still mortified. FML

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Next

TOP COMMENTS

newburton13 26

Thursday 28 February 2013 16:10

I feel sorry for the dog, their sense of smell is 100 times that of ours.

BurningGrannies 16

Thursday 28 February 2013 16:07

Then... how often do they give the dog a bath?

Comments

FALLENSEBZERO 16

Friday 1 March 2013 21:02

Thats disgusting.

diva239 8

Saturday 2 March 2013 14:40

I'm really sorry to hear that you're family is in that situation. So sad.

daemonsparta 16

Sunday 2 August 2015 20:18

******* gross

ebolson1019 12

Thursday 26 November 2015 5:19

What the hell is a fortnight

TheSacredRatty 18

Sunday 17 June 2018 16:44

2 weeks

easybree 10

Sunday 26 October 2025 0:43

why would you have your friends over your house when your parents don’t shower…

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Today, my dad walked in on me jerking off. It wouldn’t have been so bad if I wasn’t Skyping my boyfriend, while both of us were totally naked. I had just told him to “put those toes in your mouth and I’ll cum like you’ve never seen before”. FML

agreeclassic 5 938

vote type 1 4 773

Today, I asked my dad if he could fix my bed. It had been squeaking for some time. He shook his head no. He then continued with, "Your bed is a security system and as far as I can tell, you haven't gotten any in weeks". FML

agreeclassic 50 700

vote type 1 5 279

Today, I no longer need an alarm clock. My cat has learned to jump on my boobs at precisely 7:30 every morning. If I don't get up immediately, she just keeps jumping on my boobs. I'm an E cup. FML

agreeclassic 2 661

vote type 1 391

Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML

agreeclassic 33 778

vote type 1 6 728

Today, I took a shower after I finished typing an important essay I've been working on for days. My computer illiterate mum shut the computer down when I was gone, without saving a thing. When I confronted her, she yelled at me for "wasting electricity". FML

agreeclassic 31 204

vote type 1 65 028

Today, at around 11 p.m., the police made a visit to my house, explaining how my neighbors had thought I was using a universal remote to change their television channels. FML

agreeclassic 27 297

vote type 1 1 626