Animals and Cats: Messy

Messy

By Anonymous - 06/05/2024 15:00 - Germany

Today, my cat has a new hobby: She goes fishing. As in she catches the frogs out of the ornamental pond, then walks into my freshly mopped kitchen with dripping wet, muddy feet. FML

agreeclassic 378

vote type 1 170

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

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Tasty

By Anonymous - 28/12/2020 05:01

Today, despite having the choice of several bowls of clean water in the house, as well as puddles and ponds outside, my cat was drinking out of a pot I was soaking in the sink. She doesn’t seem to mind the taste of dish soap. FML

agreeclassic 723

vote type 1 118

By damn cats - 12/08/2018 22:00

Today my cat watched me clean and refill his water bowls, then shoved his fresh-out-of-the-litter-box paw in my glass of water. FML

agreeclassic 2 433

vote type 1 348

By shadokis - 12/09/2012 18:31 - United States - Charlotte

Today, my 2-year-old cat finally decided to start catching mice. Like any other cat would, she left it for me to find. I found it in the middle of the night, as my bare foot rolled its guts out of its ass. FML

agreeclassic 28 994

vote type 1 2 555

This is mine now

By tessamarque - this FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States - Bartlesville

Today, I watched my cat walk to her litter box, look at it, then walk across the room to pee on a backpack. FML

agreeclassic 27 979

vote type 1 4 620

By Anon127 - 12/06/2012 02:40 - United States - Taunton

Today, I learned that instead of training my cat, she has been training me. She now refuses to drink anything but running tap water, and yowls loudly early in the morning at my bedroom door to be fed. FML

agreeclassic 20 311

vote type 1 8 059

By Tigerlily - 03/05/2017 22:00

Today, my cat thanked me for buying her a new litterbox by peeing in all of my plants. FML

agreeclassic 4 220

vote type 1 621

By Anonymous - 26/03/2013 14:22 - United States - Audubon

Today, my cat learned the hard way what the bathtub is for. While I was in it. FML

agreeclassic 35 940

vote type 1 3 990

Smelly cat, smelly cat…

By Kas - 25/11/2020 11:02

Today, my cat decided the perfect place to throw up was on herself. Cleaning a smelly old cat with a showerhead is trouble enough, but when she tried to escape, it resulted in the bathroom being turned into one big puddle. FML

agreeclassic 787

vote type 1 148

By MoncaBang - 29/01/2009 21:25 - United States

Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML

agreeclassic 33 697

vote type 1 3 457

Bad boy!

By Carrie - 23/02/2021 21:30

Today, I was enjoying my dinner by my patio window when I spotted a cat roaming through my backyard. As I observed it explore my yard, I also watched as it climbed onto, then took a piss on the freshly clean clothes I had left to dry. FML

agreeclassic 902

vote type 1 143

wrecklesswfire 3

Tuesday 7 May 2024 18:19

hahaha cats are awesome

Comments

wrecklesswfire 3

Tuesday 7 May 2024 18:19

hahaha cats are awesome

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Today, I got a phone call from a friend, who lives in the same neighbourhood as me, wondering if it was my father she saw walking a dog by her house, wearing only his boxers. It was. FML

agreeclassic 27 938

vote type 1 2 391

Today, I reached my exam center late after taking the wrong metro twice, only to find out that I forgot my calculator at home. FML

agreeclassic 2 390

vote type 1 1 205

Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML

agreeclassic 34 901

vote type 1 4 503

Today, since I had no lessons until 1 p.m., I headed out to the store to run errands. Our school has a strict policy against leaving the campus during school hours. I returned to a fire drill taking place. The fire assembly point? The student parking lot. All 900 students watched me drive in. FML

agreeclassic 11 130

vote type 1 36 083

Today, after going to the ophthalmologist, I got some really cute glasses. When I got home, my dad saw them and told me that when he was in high school, they called girls with those glasses BC. When I asked what BC stood for, he said, "Birth control." FML

agreeclassic 1 146

vote type 1 175

Today, I realized I’d rather be the crazy cat lady rather than get married and have kids like a normal human. FML

agreeclassic 646

vote type 1 322