Friends, Birthday Dentist Birthday Girl

Birthday Girl

Anonymous - 14/05/2009 17:43 - United States

Today, it's my birthday. I got just three calls all day. The first one was my fiancé, saying he wanted his ring back. The second one was my best friend, confessing to me that she had been sleeping with my fiancé for the past three months. The third was the dentist's office, to sing me a happy birthday. FML

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The rhythm of the fight
Discover all the best anecdotes from the month of January, with or without snow, with or without you. …

andi0804 - 05/08/2009 01:33 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only call I received was from my stalker, who sang happy birthday with a japanese accent and asked if he could be my "special present". FML

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dentistftw - 08/08/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, it's my 22nd birthday. The only person who remembered was the dentist who sent me a postcard in the mail. I stopped going to him four years ago. FML

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Anonymous - 24/06/2011 23:36 - United Kingdom

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend told me he was too busy studying for finals, but that he'd take me out another day instead. He later drunk-dialled me from a party demanding a lift back home. FML

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Ignore! Ignore!

Anonymous - 12/05/2023 22:00 - Canada - Windsor

Today, I was at a job interview when my phone started ringing. It was my mom, so I quickly hit "Ignore", which was probably for the best since she was obviously drunk. She left a voicemail in which she sang "Happy Birthday" to me. It's not my birthday. FML

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Great timing, dude

misswhiskers - - Australia

Today, it's my birthday. I woke up to a text message from my boyfriend, breaking up with me. When I commented on his impeccably bad timing, he admitted he'd forgotten it was my birthday. FML

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A nickname that sticks

Anonymous - 24/03/2009 16:18 - United States

Today, I was at my friend's house celebrating his 16th birthday. I couldn't find my phone so I asked my friend's girlfriend if I could borrow her phone to see if I could hear mine ringing. I dialed my number, only to find she had my number saved in her phone as "ASS FACE #3". FML

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Are you OK?

Anonymous - 02/12/2025 09:00

Today, I answered a call I thought was from my friend and opened with, “What do you want, fuck face?” It was actually my dentist confirming my appointment. There was a long pause before she politely repeated my name to ensure they had the right patient. FML

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EKG - 11/02/2009 23:33 - United States

Today, after being in the hospital for two days with no visitors, I got my first phone call. It was my best friend asking if he could date my ex-girlfriend. FML

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New BFF unlocked

Jeremy - 28/07/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I called my sister to wish her a happy birthday. I sang the Birthday song off-key but in a spirited way, before she interrupted to say, “My birthday was yesterday.” She then added, “By the way, your ex remembered, and I think we're besties now.” FML

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Anonymous - 20/11/2010 05:49 - United States

Today, it was my birthday. The only person that remembered was my creepy stalker. FML

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xyzstephzyx 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 23:04

best friend...? Yeah, right. punch her in the mouth, that *****. happy birthday!

Aetius_fml 0

Thursday 14 May 2009 23:04

At least you have a cool dentist

iBou_fml 4

Friday 15 May 2009 14:25

Happy bday

Blithe_626 0

Friday 15 May 2009 15:38

dont give the ring bak, sell it on e bay or something and happy birthday!

iammark26 0

Friday 15 May 2009 16:18

sell the ring to ebay.happy birthday :)

MiSzOhSoFr3Sh 0

Friday 15 May 2009 17:15

Like the Others are sayinq. dO nOt. i repeat. dO nOt qive the ring baCK. yOu Can pawn it. make sOme quiCk dOLLas && qO by yOurseLf a birthday gift. fOrget them. yOu dOnt need peOpLe Like that in your Life. && by the way. Happy BeLated birthday.

ilikerainbows 0

Friday 15 May 2009 17:25

OH NO!!! I accidentally hit YDI! No really, that's absolutely awful. And I wouldn't give the ring back.

JohnnyDeathNote 0

Friday 15 May 2009 18:22

hey see its not all that bad! you got a song, come on now be happy =]

audiogasmic 0

Friday 15 May 2009 18:26

what a ***** ass. i'm sorry they ****** up your birthday. kill that bitch.

ltornetta 0

Friday 15 May 2009 19:16

you got a cool dentist...be happy lol

ammali 0

Friday 15 May 2009 19:27

:( That's horrible. I can't say Happy Birthday since I know it's so crappy right now. But I hope this year is awesome for you, and that you find better friends and a better guy. Best of luck to you.

SweetheartAngel 0

Friday 15 May 2009 19:22

#7 is right. By the way, when a guy breaks up with you, you get to keep the ring. It's if you dumped him that you give it back. So go get some money out of the situation and buy yourself something fun for your birthday! You deserve it after the people in your life are being assholes.