Bananarama By wtfisthisworldcomingto - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff Today, I was mugged. The guy mugging me was eating a banana. FML I agree, your life sucks 37 883 You deserved it 7 510 Share Tweet Share
Today, I lost my job. This was a surprise, as my performance hasn’t ever been an issue. My boss couldn’t look me in the eye while it happened, and the HR representative cut me off when I tried to ask why, informing me that they would only answer benefit-related questions. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 883 You deserved it 155
Today, my roommate decided to splash out on a prostitute. When my expensive watch and the contents of my wallet turned up missing in the aftermath, his only comment was, "Shit happens, bro." FML I agree, your life sucks 48 485 You deserved it 4 376
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me via text message. Every 20 minutes or so, I'll get a notification that I have a new message, and I check it just to find that same message sitting there. I'm being trolled by my own phone. FML I agree, your life sucks 48 667 You deserved it 4 108
Today, my brother’s cat pissed on my brand new bed. He refuses to replace the mattress, and claims it wasn’t his cat. We only have one cat. FML I agree, your life sucks 1 516 You deserved it 159
Today, I was at a local chinese restaurant with two of my friends. We were laughing hysterically when my friend tells me to stop making her laugh because she was going to puke, naturally I kept egging it on. She puked all over the table and I was laughing so hard that I peed my pants. FML I agree, your life sucks 11 783 You deserved it 67 012
Today, it's been so long since my husband has been able to give me an orgasm that when he finally did today, I started sobbing. FML I agree, your life sucks 2 090 You deserved it 377
did he stab you with the banana?
That's important information. Tell the cops to search for banana breath.