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Have you just experienced an FML moment?

Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Your instinct was right, because it’s good to laugh life off. Follow the instructions below, and if your story gets through the moderation process, it'll published in the next 24 hours or so.


    Remaining characters: 320

    Your story must start with “Today,” and end with “FML”. TXT language is forbidden and spelling mistakes hurt people’s eyeballs, so the use of either would result in the direct dismissal of your FML. Don’t use this space for discussions, advertising or spam, or for posting anything which isn’t an FML. Furthermore, it’s not possible to obtain badges by posting keywords, so stop believing things you’ve read on message boards. Don’t try reposting old FMLs, we’re not that daft.


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    Kids

    Mystery man

    By LifeSucks - 29/10/2008 11:57 - Canada

    Today, as I was taking my three year-old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 66 759
    You deserved it 3 985
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    Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Kids Parenting Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Sex Intimacy Suspicious Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home
    The Top FMyLife FMyLife
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    Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 34 068
    You deserved it 4 016
    Today, my very pregnant wife woke up in bed, grabbing her stomach and writhing in pain. Worried that the baby might be in distress, I asked her what was wrong. She gasped then let out what can only be described as a river of hot liquid shit all over herself and my legs. We both cried. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 2 458
    You deserved it 212
    Today, my roommate bitched me out over my "OCD" driving the water bill up. She takes hour-long showers, but apparently me flushing after peeing "wasteful" and a sign of a neurological disorder. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 30 243
    You deserved it 2 022
    Today, my fiancée got married. I did not. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 48 830
    You deserved it 3 446
    Today, I decided to go all-natural and go to work without any makeup on. My boss swore I was on drugs, which I guess had absolutely nothing to do with the completely "random" drug test I had to take later in the day. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 35 595
    You deserved it 3 622
    Today, on the plus side, I have the best home entertainment ever. On the annoying side, a bunch of kittens will certainly decide that running up *underneath* the protective sheet you put over the sofa is THE most fun to be had. FML
    I agree, your life sucks 705
    You deserved it 231
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