Lil_Saly_Danzr

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Castro Valley, USA
30 years-old
Tuesday 25 July 1995
complicated

A propos de Lil_saly_danzr

Hey I was just thinking ... What are some good FML's? So I joined

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Lil_saly_danzr's favorite FMLs

By konens_dick - 22/03/2009 10:38 - United States

Today, I awoke to the sound of my dad knocking on my dorm room door for a surprise visit. He's barely outside the door and I pull the door open and say hey, when my roommate strips naked pulls the door open, kisses me on the cheek, says in an uber-gay voice, "Thanks for last night", and leaves. FML

agreeclassic 276 907

vote type 1 37 151

By wetsheets - 07/01/2013 13:01 - United Kingdom - Cardiff

Today, my partner was inspired by 50 Shades Of Grey to try making me orgasm with a full bladder, therefore intensifying the experience. He was right, it was mind blowing. It also made me piss the bed for the first time in twenty-odd years. FML

agreeclassic 40 050

vote type 1 7 695

By moronforadad - 05/01/2013 02:04 - United Kingdom - Carshalton

Today, during dinner, my mum asked why I've been so upset recently, so I just admitted it was because my girlfriend had cheated on me. At some point during my venting, I asked why this stuff always seems to happen to me. My dad looked up from his plate and said, "Probably karma." FML

agreeclassic 21 817

vote type 1 6 456

Ciphered

By ewww - 26/08/2012 09:21 - United States - Seattle

Today, I accidentally decoded the system my parents use for talking about sex while I'm around. It's a substitution cipher, using literary references. As they're both literature professors, this has me perpetually grossed-out and wondering, "Are they really talking about Anne Frank, or anal fisting?" FML

agreeclassic 29 084

vote type 1 2 553

By brittgreen - 11/08/2011 20:56 - United States

Today, I was supposed to catch a ride with a friend and go to Warped Tour with her. She called at the last minute to say she was sick, so I told her we didn't have to go. I just got a text saying she just got pictures and autographs with the band I especially wanted to see. FML

agreeclassic 39 556

vote type 1 3 676