Hayte123

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Hayte123's favorite FMLs

You're the ass

By etgohome - 26/08/2013 00:10 - Canada - Kingston

Today, I almost got run over on my bike by a truck who raced through a red light. After narrowly avoiding a collision, the car slowed down. Instead of apologizing for almost killing me, the driver stuck his head out of the window and yelled, "Nice ass!" FML

agreeclassic 42 285

vote type 1 3 643

By ellen77 - 13/09/2013 05:55 - United States - Santa Barbara

Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML

agreeclassic 49 047

vote type 1 5 433

Not the smartest

By ugh Buck! - this FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I was watching a movie on TV. One of the characters has the same name as my dog, and when his name was called, my dog got so excited that he jumped face-first into my TV. FML

agreeclassic 55 488

vote type 1 4 555

Pipe down, Pam

By goshoveafuckingfrappuccinoupyourvagyoupsychocunt - 07/09/2013 21:43 - United States - Midlothian

Today, a customer kept harassing me and threatening to sue me for all I'm worth because I wouldn't give her a free refill. Her reasoning was that it's "illegal" to deny people a free refill if there's still a little drink left in the cup. FML

agreeclassic 49 234

vote type 1 3 895

By brycepetrillo - 07/09/2013 16:08 - United States - New Port Richey

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me through my birthday card. FML

agreeclassic 67 207

vote type 1 3 975