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Mario69_fml's favorite FMLs

WTF kid?

By Fag_Hag - 06/02/2009 01:30 - United States

Today, while my 4 year-old nephew was hugging me, he stepped back and declared, "Auntie, my Pee-do is hard, but it will go away." FML

agreeclassic 37 405

vote type 1 3 327

By crazyjohnny - 01/06/2009 06:52 - United States

Today, I had a really big debate in my English Class about the legalization of weed. My group had to state reasons why weed shouldn't be legal and no one except me had prepared. My partner came to class totally stoned. Our group lost the debate. We got a F. FML

agreeclassic 54 376

vote type 1 7 982

Don't make me choose

By Ames - 23/05/2009 16:07 - United States

Today, after being diagnosed with cat allergies, I explained to my cat-loving boyfriend that the doctor strongly recommended not allowing the cat in the bedroom. At 1:30 a.m. my boyfriend got out of the bed to go sleep in the spare room because, "the cat is sad." FML

agreeclassic 56 692

vote type 1 9 065

You wanker

By Jeremy - 10/05/2009 01:04 - United States

Today, my parents hosted a party at our house. After seeing one of the extremely beautiful guests, I went to masturbate in my room. When I was about to finish, my bedroom door opened suddenly. It was my mom showing around 10 party guests that our dog can open doors. FML

agreeclassic 27 318

vote type 1 87 359

By Rhyno - 05/05/2009 15:37 - United States

Today, I went to meet my girlfriends parents for the first time. I accidentally drove past their house the first time, but saw the whole family outside waiting to meet me. I pulled a U-Turn and heard a thud. The whole family watched me run over their dog. FML

agreeclassic 486

vote type 1 99

Rhyno app_comment_confession_title

Rhyno 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 23:53

To explain a bit more in detail, I pulled a U-Turn and the dog ran out of the yard and boom... It was a medium sized dog, I drive an SUV and didn't see it as I was making the turn. I didn't even know they had a dog... haha The following 20 minutes were probably the most uncomfortable of my life, after I knew the dog was fine I kinda laughed nervously and left. "Hi I'm the guy who is dating your daughter, sorry about the dog"... Live and you learn.