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Awww, thanks sweetie

By Anonymous - 08/07/2025 15:00 - United States - Reno

Today, I was in a grocery store when a little boy ran up out of nowhere, hugged my leg, then said, “Mommy!” I looked down and said, “Hey there, kiddo!” Right then, his actual mom walked up and gave me a look that seemed like it could set me on fire. The kid then looked up at me and said, “You’re prettier than my real mom.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 78

Poor little thing

By Yikes - 10/07/2025 02:00 - United States

Today, I was at my friend's house, and his cat followed me to the bathroom. I accidentally knocked down a bottle of bug spray and went to pick it up, and the cat started freaking out. Apparently, he sprays her with water so often that she's become terrified of bottles in general. Now I feel like an asshole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 71

Work it out

By Stevey - 17/07/2025 15:00 - United States - Atlanta

Today, I went to my gym and tried a new workout machine that had just been installed. I set the weight too high and ended up stuck halfway through a lift, making weird struggling noises. Most people around me stopped and stared as I awkwardly dropped the weights. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 366

Not a good look

By Thesleepinggabriel - 21/07/2025 03:00 - Albania

Today, I was making out with this hot girl at a party. She was a bad kisser and I meant to say, "It's like you're 16 and don't know how to kiss" but it came out as, "It's like I'm kissing a 16 year-old." The room fell silent and she got off my lap with a disturbed look on her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 87

You deserved it 786

Truth bombs

By Anonymous - 26/07/2025 06:00 - Trinidad and Tobago - Arima

Today, my mother-in-law came home drunk and said to my husband, "I told you not to bring a dumb girl home." I'm a kindergarten teacher with my own private school. FML

I agree, your life sucks 420

You deserved it 81

I hate small talk

By billie - 13/08/2025 03:00 - United States - Boston

Today, I pretended to be texting to avoid talking to an old classmate I saw at the grocery store. Unfortunately, my phone rang while I was “texting.” It was the classmate. I had no choice but to answer, while we were both standing 10 feet apart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 128

You deserved it 438

Classic case of the Mondays

By testuser - 18/08/2025 18:00 - Singapore - Singapore

Today, I spilled coffee on myself and now my brand new shirt is ruined, and I have to go to an important meeting immediately. FML

I agree, your life sucks 255

You deserved it 250

I think you should leave

By yctb - 21/09/2025 03:00

Today, after my parents divorced, my father promised to move out in August but has now delayed it until October out of laziness. He's barely spoken to us for months, and when he does, it's with aggressive and childish arrogance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 79

Rubbers

By Anonymous - 26/09/2025 12:00

Today, I’m bisexual and recently started dating my girlfriend who’s a lesbian. I made a complete fool of myself when we were about to have sex because out of habit I asked if she had any condoms. Sex makes me dumb I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 157

You deserved it 277

I have no idea what I'm doing

By Jeff78 - 03/10/2025 15:00

Today, I pulled up to a drive-thru speaker and my brain misfired and I said, “Thanks, I love you!” to the employee after she handed me my order. She replied, “We just met, but okay dude.” I put my food on the passenger seat and quickly scuttled off in my busted ass Toyota. FML

I agree, your life sucks 220

You deserved it 259

Cheap out

By FFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU - 05/10/2025 09:00

Today, two days after getting a fanny pack so I could more easily store my stuff when I'm out and about, I accidentally broke it without even trying. Don't be cheap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 131

You deserved it 263

Dude, come on…

By Gym Creeper - 16/10/2025 00:00

Today, I was doing squats in front of the gym's mirror. I noticed the guy next to me giving me weird looks. I assumed he was judging my form, until I realized I was standing in front of a wall of mirrors that reflected the women’s yoga class behind me. To everyone else, it looked like I was just staring at them while squatting aggressively. FML

I agree, your life sucks 316

You deserved it 121

Self help

By Anonymous - 31/10/2025 00:00

Today, I watched a YouTube video on how to fix a leaking sink. I was feeling confident and turned off what I thought was the main water valve. It wasn’t. Ten seconds later, a geyser of freezing water blasted me in the face. My cat watched the entire thing from the counter, with the most judgmental stare I’ve ever seen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 148

You deserved it 358

Get me the hell out of here

By Anonymous - 03/11/2025 12:00

Today, I live somewhere with cold weather half the year, I'm pale, and I have anemia. I have a recessive blood disorder which makes my anemia worse. I'm stuck in this city because I can't live on my own, so I'm dependent on my parents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 336

You deserved it 92

Pride and joy

By Anonymous - 07/11/2025 00:00

Today, my toddler finally used the potty for the first time. I was so excited, I FaceTimed my mom to show her. My kid then proudly picked up the potty bowl and dumped it on my lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 174

You deserved it 380

Granny Smith

By TEETH - 12/11/2025 09:00

Today, in an attempt to eat healthier snacks, I took an apple to work. I ate it after lunch. Now my teeth are full of bits of apple and I can't focus on my work because it's distracting. Three hours until I can get home and floss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 310

NEXT!

By Brito - 26/11/2025 15:00

Today, I found the girl I like’s Hinge account. Her prompts and things in common are exactly me and what I bring into a relationship, yet she rejected me. When I brought this up with her, she told me, “Well, you’re exactly what I want in a man, but I want someone taller with better looks.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 411

You deserved it 204

Hydraulic failure

By Louis - 01/12/2025 22:00

Today, I joined a work call feeling confident, until my chair slowly sank mid-meeting. I tried to discreetly readjust, but the chair hissed and dropped me two inches every few seconds until only my eyes were visible above the desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 67

Climax

By Hungry - 09/12/2025 00:00

Today, my husband managed to make Chipotle's beef barbacoa recipe perfectly in our kitchen. I couldn't stop eating, it tasted so good. Then I realized this is the most pleasure he's brought me in the six years we've been together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 312

You deserved it 183

Obviously

By Anonymous - 14/12/2025 09:00

Today, I confidently told a coworker that the “surprise meeting” was obviously a birthday celebration for our boss. I even brought cupcakes. Turns out, it was a serious budget discussion. My boss stared at the cupcakes like I was making fun of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 100

You deserved it 407

Merry ******* Christmass

By Joanne85 - 24/12/2025 22:00

Today, I volunteered to host Christmas dinner for the first time. I forgot to thaw the turkey. We ate sides, wine, and sat in disappointment while the turkey slowly defrosted in the sink. I'm never doing this again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 106

You deserved it 466

The DIY trap

By Anonymous - 28/12/2025 15:00

Today, I tried to save money by fixing a leaky sink myself. Fifteen minutes and three tools later, I had flooded under-sink cabinets and a new appreciation for plumbers. My landlord arrived with a wrench and a look that said ‘you’ll learn.’ I learned to call professionals first. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 385

Work is a four-letter word

By Anonymous - 02/01/2026 22:00

Today, I am so paranoid from being bullied at work, I need time off. But because of the bullying, I am too paranoid to take leave. I can't win. FML

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 145

Third wheel

By sammy - 11/01/2026 20:00

Today, and since 2026 started, my two friends began liking each other and I'm very happy for them. The problem? They get so close (literally and figuratively) that they do things that make me feel left out (both subjectively and objectively). Everyone says it's normal, but when I was in love I never did that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 154

You deserved it 260

Impulse purchase

By Gary - 17/01/2026 03:00

Today, I wanted a Stranger Things flashlight, but I saw they were out of stock at Target so I ordered one on Mercari. The Target website later got more in, so I paid double the original price with shipping included. I’m done online shopping for myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68

You deserved it 398

Can't handle my drinks

By Anonymous - 06/02/2025 07:00 - Philippines - San Jose del Monte

Today, I drank cocktails and shots. On the way home, I had to pee so bad that I only got to the front door and peed all over our carpet. My mom saw the whole thing and my dad saw the aftermath with the super drenched carpet and shoes. My mom had to mop the floor after I ran to the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 83

You deserved it 756

Apocalypse snow

By Anonymous - 18/02/2025 06:00 - United States

Today, I shoveled the driveway because there's enough snow to block my car. Overnight we're supposed to get six more inches of snow. It's like shoveling the driveway is a waste of time because more snow gets piled on it the next day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 331

You deserved it 148

Ninja!

By Today I closed every door on every floor of my building - 23/02/2025 16:00 - United States - Hampstead

Today, I went searching for my cat who'd escaped. Of course, I searched the entire building and somehow she'd got back in through my front door of my apartment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 96

Perfect performance

By I hate myself - 02/03/2025 22:00 - United States

Today, I walked into a café for the first time, and as I opened the door, I slammed it into the face of a poor barista. Embarrassed, I tried to apologize while holding the door open for a woman behind me, only to have my hand slip and the door crash into her as well. I then stood there, frozen, as both of them just stared at me as I apologized with, "I swear I'm not a moron." FML

I agree, your life sucks 388

You deserved it 110

I'll do anything

By Lili - 06/03/2025 12:00 - United States

Today, I texted my best friend, “Good luck with your date tonight! Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do!” She replied, "Thanks! I’ll try not to, but to be honest, that’s not saying much." I meant it as a joke, but she had no idea what I meant. It seems that I accidentally implied I’m a bad influence. FML

I agree, your life sucks 109

You deserved it 395

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The Top

Today, I shouldn't have told my boss that I was interested in management. She now throws any problem she doesn't want to solve at me and either gets mad when I can't work it out or takes credit when I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 427

You deserved it 6 649

Today, my cat was sleeping on me while I was laying in bed. I had to use the washroom, so I pushed him off. Except he used my testicles as a way to latch on to me, through my underwear. Let's just say, after having to change the sheets due to blood, I'm considering wearing a jockstrap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 240

Today, after days of cleaning out pantry cabinets and throwing away infested food, I thought I had finally gotten rid of my moth problem. Then I vacuumed, and saw several dozen larvae coming out of my carpet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 352

You deserved it 3 126

Today, I bought my mother an expensive TV she had been looking at. After I bought it, she continued browsing for more stuff. I told her I couldn't afford the extra items. She got mad and called me "selfish". FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 742

You deserved it 1 138

Today, I came home from out of state. I found out someone online had told my husband that the "fumes" from hot showers can be lethal. As a precaution, he removed the draft-blocking bathroom door to make sure it's "properly ventilated." FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 385

You deserved it 2 555

Today, I had a big final project due for class. None of my project partners would help me yesterday, because they were convinced we'd have a snow day. Unfortunately, we didn't have a snow day, and we failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 614

You deserved it 7 616