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Allo Trollsters. This is the silly girl who posted the FML. A few disclaimers: 1) Rent is cheaper here than you are thinking. My last place here ran under $500, utilities included. If we split the cost, we aren't looking at massive expenses. 2) He is 25 years old, he lives at his parents' for free, he has a job AND THEY GIVE HIM AN ALLOWANCE. Oh, yeah, and they pay his bills for him. 3) Yes, he acquired all the nerf guns at once, within the past week. 4) I don't have a problem with his hobby. Boys will be boys, and I kinda have a thing for nerds. I do, however, have a problem with the fact that he has lied to me for the past 6 months about his future aspirations... Because I have been busting ass, nose-to-the-grindstone, working towards getting my debts paid off so we could get this place together. Aaaaand, apparently toys are more important.

Unfair

By jaycee - 28/01/2012 03:41 - United States

Today, after having finally summoned the nerve to report a guy at my workplace who has been sexually harassing me for months, I got a phone call from my boss. He said that there was nothing he could do about it, because the guy "wouldn't confess." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 212

You deserved it 2 651

By Bajar - 18/12/2012 19:53 - Australia

Today, while at the airport waiting for my flight, I sat down next to a mother and her son. As I pulled out a water bottle, she leaned over to her son and said, "Promise me you will never do what the man next to you just did." I have no idea what the hell I did wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 365

You deserved it 4 051

Bajar tells us more.

Bajar 1

Wednesday 19 December 2012 7:01

Hey all, OP here. To clarify a few things: it was at the airport lounge, the mother and son had a double couch together and I had a single chair next to the son. The water bottle was disposable and on a clearly visible pocket in my backpack. I still have no idea what I did wrong.

By redbluegreen - 09/08/2009 09:26 - United States

Today, I found out that not only has my father been cheating on my mother with another woman, but they have a child together with the same name as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 107 266

You deserved it 4 045

redbluegreen tells us more.

redbluegreen 40

Tuesday 19 July 2011 1:20

That actually wasn't the reason. The mother was the one that decided on the name, not my dad. She did it so that he could leave my mom and me without 'losing' anything.

Tough guy, huh?

By Anonymous - 14/06/2012 20:59 - United Kingdom - Croydon

Today, my face got intimate with several plywood boards, and I suffered lacerations and bruising. I told my friends I got the wounds from taking a few guys down in a bar fight. Now they're dragging me out into a rough part of town to give them "muscle" while they try to score some crack. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 345

You deserved it 44 337

By somerandomchick - 31/03/2009 05:32 - United States

Today, my little sister got mad at me because I wouldn't let her read my IM conversation. I took a nap and when I woke up, my laptop was gone. She took it on a trip to her grandparents' house, six hours away. Nude pictures of me and my paper due tomorrow are on the laptop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 947

You deserved it 30 504

By kaichennnxx - 17/03/2009 02:09 - United States

Today, I was with my grandma waiting in a line. She only speaks Chinese and there was a black man in front of us talking his phone. My grandma tells me that the black man's really loud and annoying. The man finishes and turns and said fluently in Chinese, "What's wrong with loud black men?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 282

You deserved it 31 964

Which one are you?

By Anonymous - 19/02/2013 00:26 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I met my new class. There are two Kevin Smiths. Neither will agree to a nickname, they have the same hair color, and their middle names both start with J. They have told me to call them Kevin 1 and Kevin 2. They both want to be Kevin 1. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 713

You deserved it 3 453

By creepedasfuck - 23/09/2012 16:50 - United States - Limington

Today, my step-brother had some serious bowel distress and rushed to the bathroom. Because he forgot to quit his group chat with his buddies, I quickly found out that the reason he's so over-protective, and hostile to my male friends, is because he wants to get into my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 217

You deserved it 2 385

By person - 26/12/2010 17:59 - Jordan

Today, I was applying some Icy Hot to my sore thighs, when I accidentally got a little on my dime sacks. For the next hour, it felt like someone had lit a match under my plums. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 938

You deserved it 28 354

By violated ._. - 22/08/2013 22:45 - United States

Today, I did something I'd always wanted to do: I went swimming with dolphins. It was really fun, until I went to kiss the dolphin, and she slipped her tongue half into my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 330

You deserved it 15 409

By screwed - 30/10/2009 21:24 - United States

Today, my boyfriend called and asked me why I love him. I told him because he's always there for me and continues to put up with my bipolar disorder. He promptly said "not anymore" and hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 036

You deserved it 5 456

By HotACE - 22/04/2011 05:08

Today, while having sex with my girlfriend, she tells me that the flab on my stomach does not turn her on, and stops in the middle of it. Therefore, until my diet is over, guess who doesn't get any. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 999

You deserved it 22 748

Silver linings

By Anonymous - 16/12/2009 19:28 - United States

Today, my boyfriend of over a year told me that he will never marry me because we are different ethnicities and his parents don't approve. I was of course very upset and crying. His way to comfort me was by saying, "Don't worry, I will always cheat on my wife with you." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 290

You deserved it 3 763

By waytootan - 22/08/2011 20:34 - United States

Today, I came in to work looking very tan. I took Friday off to go to a friend's funeral, which was outdoors, and I tan very easily. Now my boss and everyone else thinks I lied about my friend's death to get off work on a Friday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 032

You deserved it 3 135

Catch

By Anonymous - 30/05/2011 08:28 - Australia

Today, I was walking through town when a rough looking woman asked me for a cigarette. I don't smoke but I offered her some apples, and she took two. As I continued on past her, she pegged both of them at me, hitting the back of my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 251

You deserved it 11 899

By meggs2209 - 12/01/2012 20:06 - United States

Today, Dell's tech support called to tell me that the laptop I sent to them was going to cost an extra $300 to fix, because of the shattered screen. When I mailed my laptop to them, the touchpad wasn't working. The screen was fine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 933

You deserved it 2 953

By Anonymous - 23/09/2012 11:01 - United States

Today, my girlfriend learned that calling someone a "stupid bitch" under your breath while staring right at them from six feet away works very differently in my house than at hers. She also learned my sister has one hell of a punch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 758

You deserved it 12 584

By Anonymous - 20/08/2012 12:12 - United States - Worcester

Today, my husband had a temper tantrum because I wouldn't get him a chocolate bar at the store register. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 388

You deserved it 5 928

By Anonymous - 04/06/2009 14:09 - Australia

Today, I went into work and noticed one of my fellow colleagues had a large bunch of flowers on her desk. As soon as I saw her, I immediately said, "Happy Birthday!" Everyone went quiet. It wasn't her birthday; her father had died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 480

You deserved it 56 799

By Username - 10/08/2011 12:36 - United States

Today, my boyfriend leaned over and sniffed me like a dog. He does this almost every day, even in front of people sometimes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 565

You deserved it 7 171

By MoneyMoneyMoneyMonayMONAY - 21/03/2012 20:13 - United States

Today, I found a $10 bill on the ground. I got so excited and felt like I was the richest person alive. That was, until the wind blew it out of my hand, never to be seen again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 206

You deserved it 7 915

Get in there!

By Menareidiots - 24/02/2009 23:32 - United States

Today, my guy friend and I were in his dorm room watching a movie when he started kissing me. Things heated up so we moved things over to his bed. He was on me when a hand shoots down from his top bunk. His roommate had been up there the whole time and he wanted a high-five. So they high-fived. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 857

You deserved it 22 733

By Anonymous - 15/01/2013 20:56 - Finland - Helsinki

Today, after a long, horrible day at work and some fighting with my family and my girlfriend, I decided to cheer myself up by going to McDonald's for a change. I burst into tears when the cashier told me they couldn't make me a Mars McFlurry because they'd run out of ingredients. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 972

You deserved it 8 604

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Miscellaneous Stalker My ex Coworkers Love Internet Relatable AITA Pokémon Awkward Work Parenting Kids Annoying Shopping Underwear Jealousy Parents Thief Suspicious Sex Intimacy Family NSFW Birthday Gifts I need your advice Accident Abuse Moving home

The Top

Today, my half-sister lied and told my mom I got a girl at school pregnant. My mom is unreasonable at the best of times, but after a full hour trying to get me to name this nonexistent girl, she's calling every parent from school to check if their daughters are hiding a secret pregnancy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 245

You deserved it 97

Today, I got home and found all my things thrown out into the yard, including the stuff from my mancave, which I spent thousands of dollars on. Apparently, my girlfriend stopped for a visit while my wife was home. I’d stupidly given her a key. Turns out my wife called out sick today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 137

You deserved it 4 950

Today, it's been a week since I giggled at my coworker who was worried our jobs will be replaced by AI, since we're delivery drivers. At first I was amused and sceptical, but some sort of paranoia has since kicked in, and I'm now imagining AI drones taking over our jobs and I'm bugging out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 371

Today, my mom announced my pregnancy to the entire family via Facebook with the post, "Just went from a MILF to a GILF in one moment of unprotected sex." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 014

You deserved it 5 707

Today, I finally convinced my son to use the potty. Later, he saw a show on TV about a toilet monster. Now he's too scared to even step foot into the bathroom. Here's to another few months of diaper changes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 977

You deserved it 4 507

Today, at the gym, a very attractive lady was working out in front of me, wearing tiny shorts that left zero to the imagination. I kept trying to avert my gaze, until her extremely buff boyfriend came over and threatened me. My crime? I wasn’t checking out his girl enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 159

You deserved it 158