When there is edible food in my fridge By Lewis - 18/12/2018 18:00 Actually, it never happens... I agree, your life sucks 258 You deserved it 84 Share Tweet Share
Today, I flew to see my long distance boyfriend who I haven't seen in 6 months. Upon seeing me, he ran up to me, picked me up and swung me around like they do in the movies. In doing so, my foot hit a 4 year-old child who was running past and knocked him out. FML I agree, your life sucks 83 863 You deserved it 9 230
Today, I moved into my new house. The previous occupants failed to tell me that they'd recently kicked out their crazy crackhead son, who seems to think they've paid me to pretend that they've moved out and that I'm the new owner. He wants back in. FML I agree, your life sucks 47 336 You deserved it 3 607
Today, I went out with my mom to a restaurant. We were sitting down to eat, and a waitress walks over to our table and asks, "How are you ladies doing tonight?" It really was a nice thing to ask, for my mom. As for me, being a man, not so much. FML I agree, your life sucks 20 922 You deserved it 2 299
Today, I have a second date with someone I like. Usually, I have a minor acne problem, but this week I've had four of them. FML I agree, your life sucks 745 You deserved it 105
Today, I got nominated to sit in a chair in the middle of the gym during a high school rally while the entire school got to throw paper balls at me. FML I agree, your life sucks 46 003 You deserved it 4 675
Today, a certain insurance company that rhymes with “Asshealth” caused my autistic ass to lose over a year of sobriety from self harm when their intentionally frustrating automated system caused me to blackout and I bashed my head against a doorframe, all to be told to call a different number that didn’t even work. FML I agree, your life sucks 638 You deserved it 379
Calm yourself!
I’ll just grab a quick snack & no one will ever know...